True Story...
- Thread starter Kes
- Start date
santa sangria
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I'm reliably informed that the Norwegian, Swedish and Danish Navy all put bar codes on the hull of their vessels.
This is so that whenever they return to port they can Scandinavian.
ROTFLMAO
The added genius here is that, for once, Finland hasn’t been incorrectly added to a lost of Scandinavian nations.
Anyway, I salute you!
He didn't Finnish the punchline.
Peter Grove
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Leave me out of it! I'm simultaneously a brilliant and awful Referee, until the observer shows up
If people doing a quiz have a quizzical look on their faces, how do people look whilst doing a test?
There are seven ages of man:
Sixteen to twenty-five... twice daily.
Twenty-five to thirty-five... thrice weekly.
Thirty-five to forty-five... try weekly.
Forty-five to fifty-five... try weakly.
Fifty-five to sixty-five... try oysters.
Sixty-five to seventy-five... try anything.
Seventy-five and beyond... try to remember.
Sixteen to twenty-five... twice daily.
Twenty-five to thirty-five... thrice weekly.
Thirty-five to forty-five... try weekly.
Forty-five to fifty-five... try weakly.
Fifty-five to sixty-five... try oysters.
Sixty-five to seventy-five... try anything.
Seventy-five and beyond... try to remember.
Not sure about 16 to 25There are seven ages of man:
Sixteen to twenty-five... twice daily.
Twenty-five to thirty-five... thrice weekly.
Thirty-five to forty-five... try weekly.
Forty-five to fifty-five... try weakly.
Fifty-five to sixty-five... try oysters.
Sixty-five to seventy-five... try anything.
Seventy-five and beyond... try to remember.
santa sangria
RefChat Addict
It was that Dordogne gag wasn’t it!
I didn't see that joke. Was the standard Loire than expected?
Stolen from Facebook.
Son, we live in a world that has fields, and those soccer fields have to be guarded by men with whistles. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Soccer Fan? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the players, and you curse the Referee. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That player’s yellow card, while tragic, probably prevented injuries. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, prevents injuries. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you WANT me on that field, you NEED me on that field. We use words like foul, play on, offside. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent refereeing something. You use them as a punch line. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very fun that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it! I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a whistle, and get on a yellow shirt. Either way, I don't give a DAMN what you think you are entitled to!
Son, we live in a world that has fields, and those soccer fields have to be guarded by men with whistles. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Soccer Fan? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the players, and you curse the Referee. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That player’s yellow card, while tragic, probably prevented injuries. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, prevents injuries. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you WANT me on that field, you NEED me on that field. We use words like foul, play on, offside. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent refereeing something. You use them as a punch line. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very fun that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it! I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a whistle, and get on a yellow shirt. Either way, I don't give a DAMN what you think you are entitled to!
Peter Grove
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I think my doctor likes my new trainers.
When I wore them to my annual physical recently, she told me I had some serious healthy shoes.
When I wore them to my annual physical recently, she told me I had some serious healthy shoes.
Since this is the "true story" topic....
Arrived at my U21 game yesterday and went for inspecting a second field as the field to my game had changed. Player warming up on the field asked "ref, what undies do you ref in?". I wasn't sure if I misheard him or he misspoke but I say "Victoria's Secret. Why do you ask?" He laughed and said "I mean under what age group?". He wanted to if I am the referee for their game.
Arrived at my U21 game yesterday and went for inspecting a second field as the field to my game had changed. Player warming up on the field asked "ref, what undies do you ref in?". I wasn't sure if I misheard him or he misspoke but I say "Victoria's Secret. Why do you ask?" He laughed and said "I mean under what age group?". He wanted to if I am the referee for their game.
santa sangria
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Peter Grove
RefChat Addict
It's also the difference between knowing your sh*t and knowing you're sh*t.