Yes, I make you rightI don't think this is how VAR involvement works. If there was a DOGSO and the referee was clearly and obviously wrong to not call it (regardless how wrong or twisted the reason behind the no call was), VAR has to recommend a review.
The reason VAR didn't get involved was because he didn't thing this was a clear and obvious DOGSO, again regardless of why the referee didn't call it. If he'd thought it was a clear DOGSO, then he'd call the ref to review, ref realizes his first handball mistake then judges the considerations for DOGSO.
VAR and ref shouldn't be having a meeting to discuss how a decision by the ref is reached. VAR is not to fix a KMI decision process, it's to fix the outcome if it is clearly and obviously wrong.
In essence, the process doesn't accommodate the incident that occurred
There's a paradoxical problem. Either way, it all went wrong. I bet comms between Ref and VAR are a mess. Hard to stick rigidly to an unfit process when under pressure. Bet there was stuff said that came close to/and/or breached the process

