The Ref Stop

First cards !!!!!!

Z

Zimmyman

Well-Known Member
Ok 9 games in and a dream start with me getting some top marks 2x100s etc and good comments !
Did an early game yesterday a dream game !!
Under14s then on to the afternoon under13s game and all hell breaks lose one player dissent all the time so 1st caution ! Them before the second half kick off he states deriding again about the ball being on the centre circle but his Manner was he was just taking the p-/s
So I ask him to quieten to no affect so second yellow followed by the red ! Manager swearing at me who I warned !! So I feel I acted on the dissent quickly ! Anothe caution in the second half player wants to not retreat
And tells me he will count the steps and again with attitude !
The best was yet to come when I blew the final whistle and while walking off a player from the same team call me a bald c—/t
I say firmly player come here and I get a prompt NO !! Bearing in mind this is an under 13 game ! A lady who I assume was his mother told him to come to me and not make it worse for himself and he got a straight Offinabus !! I felt I handled all situations well enough and I will learn a lot from this game on how to issue the cards correctly etc
The other team were perfect and all shook my hand as so did the away manager who said I controlled the game well!! So s learning
Curve for me ! Which I will learn from but I really felt I got on top of things early enough oh yes and the abusive parents ! Well a great initiation I’m off on a months break now and can’t wait to get back in the saddle
 
The Ref Stop
That’s crazy for that age group.
I’ve never come across anything like that in any of my youth matches. Even up to under 18/19s I’ve done.
Sounds like just a bad egg team.
 
All of that reads pretty good for me well done. Except the warning for a manager swearing at you. You may want to rethink that.
 
Re the end, I do not approach the player, I would merely clock his number, and wait till things calm down (which they will), I then find a suitable moment to approach someone responsible, and then advise them that number 3 has been sent off after the final whistle for f/a and a report will be submitted. If you are going to be rule to thumb on getting names etc, then, I ask the coach, any resistance then thats fine, number 3 it is along with mention to league that the coach refused to give up the information.
my thinking, avoid conflict, emotions are clearly running high at the end of this game, its kids, you wont get sense out of them, you risk conflict with parents, I read your post and it seems to me you are drawing a lot of attention to yourself at the end, creating a scene, so my advice is to retain dignity, move away from the fire, not towards it, and handle things in an adult (not always a referee) manner.

I dont fully understand the double yellow tbh but am sure there are other ways it could have been handled from how it reads
 
Zimmyman said:
Ok 9 games in and a dream start with me getting some top marks 2x100s etc and good comments !
Did an early game yesterday a dream game !!
Under14s then on to the afternoon under13s game and all hell breaks lose one player dissent all the time so 1st caution ! Them before the second half kick off he states deriding again about the ball being on the centre circle but his Manner was he was just taking the p-/s
So I ask him to quieten to no affect so second yellow followed by the red ! Manager swearing at me who I warned !! So I feel I acted on the dissent quickly ! Anothe caution in the second half player wants to not retreat
And tells me he will count the steps and again with attitude !
The best was yet to come when I blew the final whistle and while walking off a player from the same team call me a bald c—/t
I say firmly player come here and I get a prompt NO !! Bearing in mind this is an under 13 game ! A lady who I assume was his mother told him to come to me and not make it worse for himself and he got a straight Offinabus !! I felt I handled all situations well enough and I will learn a lot from this game on how to issue the cards correctly etc
The other team were perfect and all shook my hand as so did the away manager who said I controlled the game well!! So s learning
Curve for me ! Which I will learn from but I really felt I got on top of things early enough oh yes and the abusive parents ! Well a great initiation I’m off on a months break now and can’t wait to get back in the saddle
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How did you find out your marks? I've not seen any from my 20 games this season :|
 
Referee117 said:
How did you find out your marks? I've not seen any from my 20 games this season :|
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Mine are out of 10 not 100 and when I sign the sheet the 2 teams have already filled their sections in so I just look above where I sign for my marks out of 10
 
JoeMaloney5 said:
Mine are out of 10 not 100 and when I sign the sheet the 2 teams have already filled their sections in so I just look above where I sign for my marks out of 10
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Hmm, must just be a thing the teams don't do in my local league. Ah well, I'm still getting assigned games so I'm assuming I haven't had 20 0/100's
 
i bring out my red friend. I would bin the manager. It will make it easier when we. are allowed to give cards to the bench just seems to make things clearer for every one. I would have doubled yellow, and I would have called the player over to send him off. In my youth leagues we do not have team sheets.
 
I hear some of what you say !! I was merely going towards the Lino for my flag it was still on the field of play so the card was out ! There was no one responsible to have talked with anyway !! The manager had already shown his true colours with his language
I feel I acted correctly as an adult who is old enough to be the boys grandfather when one is called a C/:/:/t by a 12 year old on the FOP then that and my other cards I believe to have been correct it was my 9th game 8 without a card so I don’t give them out willy nilly thank you for your input
 
Zimmyman said:
I hear some of what you say !! I was merely going towards the Lino for my flag it was still on the field of play so the card was out ! There was no one responsible to have talked with anyway !! The manager had already shown his true colours with his language
I feel I acted correctly as an adult who is old enough to be the boys grandfather when one is called a C/:/:/t by a 12 year old on the FOP then that and my other cards I believe to have been correct it was my 9th game 8 without a card so I don’t give them out willy nilly thank you for your input
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Is there anything you feel you could have done differently to avert these incidents?
 
Grow some hair:) you were bang on at the end. I totally back you on this. All your reasoning is spot on. If it was OA there would be no discussion about this. 8 games with out a card wow. Now you have broken that duck you will find it is easier to give them out. It is like a dam breaking! On a serious note the fact that you are carding at youth level is good. There are a lot of refs out there who don't, and it makes it harder for the ones who do.
 
A few things like how I gave the cards IE procedure !! Explanation etc ! Dealing with the player I sent off he would not leave area then his dad wanted to see me after the game and so on ! I’m learning ! I’m keen ! I want to get it right
Thanks for your help
 
Zimmyman said:
I want to get it right
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This is the crux of it. We're all pursuing a calm, empathetic and authoritative demeanor, with concise and assertive communication. Not that any of us will ever get their, but your comment shows you'll give it a shot
The cautioning/dismissing process takes a lot of practice. I'm nowhere near adept at it, despite having taken ~60 names
No training course or role play can really prepare you for the reality of this
 
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Zimmyman said:
A few things like how I gave the cards IE procedure !! Explanation etc ! Dealing with the player I sent off he would not leave area then his dad wanted to see me after the game and so on ! I’m learning ! I’m keen ! I want to get it right
Thanks for your help
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I think Ms Ciley was questioning the second yellow at the kick off of the second half. I’ve had nutty dissent at a kick off after a goal but that sounds really odd. What happened there?
 
With what the twelve year old said to you I don't think you need to explain it to him. Ask his name and get the red out and go and get changed.
 
All my Sunday games are U13s and U14s

Ive had to YC about 4 in last 10 games for dissent.

A manager asked me last Sunday why i had sent the caution in and what the lad had said to me, i told him it was three weeks ago i cant recall the exact words as im doing 4/5 games most weekends.

The managers in our league are not used to the refs sending in the cards which creates a problem for the ones who are doing it properly.
 
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