The Ref Stop

Claims to be a referee by manager

Ori

Well-Known Member
once again I feel I misjudged, but this time I should have been tougher.

U18 girls match. Midway through first half, player leaves the ground on a tackle. I booked her…..boarder line red, but I called it as I saw it. Player doesn’t complain. Understands her booking and so do her teams mates who all agree it’s a caution.

Now the manager comes to me at half time and claims he is a ref and that’s a talking to as she got the ball. I replied, if you’re a ref then you know “I got the ball” doesn’t matter. I felt it was uncontrolled and potentially endangered the opponent.

Left it.
Now second half same manager is constantly asking me to book players for literally nothing. I pointed out to him that asking for a booking is a bookable offence. I was too lenient as he continued when I was actually about to book a player for dissent. Should have booked him too, but I didn’t and I regret it now.
 
The Ref Stop
once again I feel I misjudged, but this time I should have been tougher.

U18 girls match. Midway through first half, player leaves the ground on a tackle. I booked her…..boarder line red, but I called it as I saw it. Player doesn’t complain. Understands her booking and so do her teams mates who all agree it’s a caution.

Now the manager comes to me at half time and claims he is a ref and that’s a talking to as she got the ball. I replied, if you’re a ref then you know “I got the ball” doesn’t matter. I felt it was uncontrolled and potentially endangered the opponent.

Left it.
Now second half same manager is constantly asking me to book players for literally nothing. I pointed out to him that asking for a booking is a bookable offence. I was too lenient as he continued when I was actually about to book a player for dissent. Should have booked him too, but I didn’t and I regret it now.
You call it as you see it, as this “qualified ref manager” should well know.

I probably don’t need to say this, but after a quiet word, I think I’d be giving the manager the yellow card he so rightly has earnt.

I think the key thing here to remember is manager’s should not be approaching you at half time to remonstrate, that in itself is a bookable offence (possibly red card - quickly opens IFAB - it’s a red card = deliberately leaving the technical area to:
• show dissent towards, or remonstrate with, a match official).

However don’t dwell on this, it’s something that is still unordinary in grassroots football, bear in mind booking and red cards for managers m in the professional game have only appeared with regularity in the last few years (COVID seemed to be the catalyst for this).
 
Agree with Ginger, don't fret over it. Yes you should have booked him so learn and apply from now on. So that next time, you're confident in applying law
 
Yes absolutely you should have booked him if he continued after you warned him. Especially after telling him it's a bookable offence. But hay, you already know that.

When managers or players tell you I'm a referee respectfully tell them for this game you are not, I am. Don't get into a discussion with them as there is only one way that could go.
 
Can be as much of a qualified referee as my milkman, doesn’t mean he’s a) in charge of this game, or b) ever officiated at this level (or at all).

Dont dwell on it, and you know that -next time- you’ll deal with it differently having had the experience (which is how we learn) :)
 
This is also a story of low level dissent.

We need to recognise low level dissent act. The first time the manager calls for a card during play you need to do something. If you have comms maybe one option is to use your AR. But I think it’s an easy booking. What you probably don’t want to do is go over and give a verbal warning as it looks like you are letting him off.

Use your cards my friend!
”Everyone can see you. Sorry, I have to card you. Calm down and let’s get back to the football!”
 
90% of times a manager or player says they are a referee they aren't. They might have been in the past, or they might have had to do the LoTG module that used to be compulsory on the coaching courses and mistakenly assumed this made them qualified. It doesn't.

Deal with them as you do anyone else, I would even argue you could be harsher with them, using the line "well as you are a referee you should know better".
 
Even if he is a referee (which I very much doubt [although he might have done a course at some point]) he is not THE referee. In any event, pretty much all qualified referees understand the sensitivities around their involvement in other aspects of the game and would not confront a colleague in this way. RustyRef and others have provided excellent advice for dealing with this situation on future occasions. Don’t let it get you down.
 
Thanks troops.

I’ll be tougher next time.

I think it would be harsh to send a manger off for coming onto the pitch at half time to ask me a question. Obviously how they do it does matter.
Had a manager come up to me at half time today and just asked what the player said to get booked for dissent. I told him and his reaction was “stupid idiot” referring to his own player. He thanked me and walked back to dugout.

These are u18 local leagues.
 
Thanks troops.

I’ll be tougher next time.

I think it would be harsh to send a manger off for coming onto the pitch at half time to ask me a question. Obviously how they do it does matter.
Had a manager come up to me at half time today and just asked what the player said to get booked for dissent. I told him and his reaction was “stupid idiot” referring to his own player. He thanked me and walked back to dugout.

These are u18 local leagues.
Deliberately leaving the technical area to show dissent towards, or remonstrate with, a match official probably isn't in play at half-time as they are allowed to leave their technical area at the point (obviously not playing down the dissent, but definitely playing down the leaving the technical area).

But for the half-time 'act of dissent', managers at all levels will approach you at half-time to get in your head, or complain as they are extremely heated and they probably think it will influence you. Do not talk on the pitch, politely invite them to do it in the change room but ask them to give you 10 minutes to cool down (but mainly for them to cool down and most won't bother anyway).

I agree with your assessment of the remaining incidents. You started managing it (warned them), but once you threaten someone with a booking you really are backed into a corner to act on the next incident. Good reflection though!
 
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It absolutely is in play:

View attachment 7611
Every day is a school @JamesL

I guess the dictionary definition of confront is quite intense.

So I would ask yourself did the manager fall into the "hostile or argumentative intent" category.

I would just interrupt them by asking them to continue the conversation in the changing room after I'd had time to cool down. Then appropriate action if required.
 
Every day is a school @JamesL

I guess the dictionary definition of confront is quite intense.

So I would ask yourself did the manager fall into the "hostile or argumentative intent" category.

I would just interrupt them by asking them to continue the conversation in the changing room after I'd had time to cool down. Then appropriate action if required.
I didn't say it was the only way to deal with it. 🙂

Lots of environmental factors at play - where are the changing rooms? Lots of teams I've reffed have changing rooms where it's impossible to get to without entering field of play at half time so also have to consider this when deciding if they deliberately entered to...

Sunday morning, team talks by the water bottles - have to consider why they are there? Is it respectful etc etc. not every glove fits every hand and all that.
 
I didn't say it was the only way to deal with it. 🙂

Lots of environmental factors at play - where are the changing rooms? Lots of teams I've reffed have changing rooms where it's impossible to get to without entering field of play at half time so also have to consider this when deciding if they deliberately entered to...

Sunday morning, team talks by the water bottles - have to consider why they are there? Is it respectful etc etc. not every glove fits every hand and all that.
I didn't mean the latter for you. Just me going in circles with myself.

You spotted I was incorrect in law and corrected me with the law.

Everything else is a YHTBT moment!
 
I have heard recently a managed was taken off the promotion pathway because he was booked for decent
 
So I got sent the video of the tackle that the manager said was only a warning.

Yellow card and maybe even red card. You can zoom in

Thoughts…….
Personally that's a spot on yellow.

Without knowing how the rest of the game played out and the intensity of the game, I think most people would have been surprised if the red was pulled out. I know in the LOTG it doesn't matter I think the fact the girl was able to keep on playing as easily as she did would have made it impossible to reason with the manager if he was that annoyed by a yellow.
 
She got the ball was the managers (who claims to be a ref) saying it should only be a warning.

For me she is off the ground and is a stone wall yellow. If studs were out which I couldn’t tell then it’s a red, but at the time I felt a yellow was enough and he felt hard done by.
 
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