Really? I'll leave my whistle, cards, notepad, handbook, assessor's notes, powerpoints and practical exercises in a carrier bag by the front door. If someone could pop them in the bin, the binmen will collect on Thursday. I found myself seriously considering how much bstard was wrong but if referees sensitivity meters are cranked to 11 what's next? Cautions for looking at me in a funny way?
Junior/Youth What have I become, sending off an 11 year old!
- Thread starter DaveMac
- Start date
So @Brian Hamilton you think an 11 year old boy should be allowed to shout half way across a pitch and use the word crap. I personally feel that the combination of slightly abusive language and questioning of eye site is enough to walk. There are refs that would send someone for saying you need glasses, if you let kids at a young age get away with it he'll be doing the same thing next week, next year and keep going till he stops playing. I personally see it as a way of nipping the behaviour in the bud early on. In fairness I am fairly lenient with kids, so takes alot for me to get the red out.
I didn't say he should be allowed to do it, I said there was a different way of dealing with it.
Answer this for me? If an open age player did the same thing, what action would you take?
OA I'd have gone for a yellow for dissent. Which I'm well aware is double standards of course! But taking into account the age of the players, I'd refereed an awful lot of youth football, alot of u11 as well, and it is the worst incident of vocal abuse I've experienced. Not so much the language, just how direct the comment was and the volume of it.
I think it would be a yellow from me although would likely have let that slide given the time and score. Although I understand that an 11 year old saying 'crap' is the extreme at that age so can sort of see why you could justify a red.
In my U11 today the ball hadn't fully gone off, the CAR flagged and so the defender picked it up within the penalty area. Gave the goal kick rather than the penalty. Not sure what I'd have done with an older age group.
In my U11 today the ball hadn't fully gone off, the CAR flagged and so the defender picked it up within the penalty area. Gave the goal kick rather than the penalty. Not sure what I'd have done with an older age group.
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@CallumS I had one weird CAR and one annoying CAR in this game. One put the flag in his pocket and just used his hands to signal, not actually using the flag. It was just odd. I asked him at half time why he wasnt using the flag, and he just said he didnt realised he had to. I told him if he could use it it would make life easier for me, he still didnt in the second half. Other CAR was one of those that flags all the time when the ball looks like its going out, but with a crazy wind and super long grass it wasnt always going so theres me signalling for a throw only for him to say he hadnt gone, leaving a bunch of confused boys. In the end I just made sure I hugged that touchline for most of the game so I could loudly say if the ball was in or out to stop the confusion.
Padfoot
The Persecuted One
Very very harsh......nailed on dissent, powder puff light for OFFINABUS.
I've thought long and hard about my reply to this post. I apologise if you think any of the following comments are taken personally.
Let's look at the facts. He shouted at you and used a single bad word.
Let's look at the outcome. the player is banned for 2 weeks and his club fined £35.
Let's review why you would have a different approach at open age. Is it perhaps because you are trying to educate the player so he is less of a problem when he reaches open age or is it because you didn't like the way an 11 year old talked to you.
I really think you have over reacted here. To be offended by a child questioning your eye sight is really worrying. I've sent off an 11 year old. He asked me how much money the opponents had paid me. When he was challenged on his statement in the presence of his coach (who I called over from 20 yards away) he repeated the statement and then called me a cheat. It's along way from suggesting I have crap eye sight from 50 yards. I've already suggested how you should have handled this. Even a caution might have been too much.
One of my CAR's was offered a flag but preferred to use a bib. Flagged lots but would not sustain the signal meaning I missed half of them.
The other CAR didn't signal for offside correctly. I had to pull back play about 45 seconds and ask him in future to raise flag above his head until I've seen.
Lots of foul throws throughout which was a nuisance. Think I've decided on 2 goes going forward. On the bright side I didn't hear my name called once (like everyone else my name is ref apparently - I always get massively confused if a player called Callum is playing). Got to give a couple off indirect free kicks which was useful as I wanted to get used to them. Also had to explain to coaches that you could take a throw in with feet on the pitch as long as part of the feet where on the sideline.
I'm speechless.
Crack a joke, make fun of him, walk over and give him an absolute roasting. Threaten him you could caution, threaten you could send off. Make him apologise to you. Pretty much anything would be a better way of dealing with this than a red card.
You have a real opportunity to educate here. The straight red just makes you into a strawman and means the keeper WON'T be thinking about anything other than how precious you are.
Crack a joke, make fun of him, walk over and give him an absolute roasting. Threaten him you could caution, threaten you could send off. Make him apologise to you. Pretty much anything would be a better way of dealing with this than a red card.
You have a real opportunity to educate here. The straight red just makes you into a strawman and means the keeper WON'T be thinking about anything other than how precious you are.
Very, very severe. You should try coming to one of my lessons - you'll probably hear much worse!! Probably from me 
He'll be the man in school tomorrow because he got a red card at the weekend - education value 0.
I appreciate all of the comments, and do see how people think it was a soft card. I'm still personally happy with the decision given this individual situation.
@CallumS in this game one of the lads who took the throws all the time had this horrible technique where he would leap in the air like a gazelle before growing. Meaning the manager was screaming foul throw all the time. I kept my eye on it each time and it never was. But the uproar it was causing I just kept preying he wouldn't pick up the ball whenever there was a throw!
@CallumS in this game one of the lads who took the throws all the time had this horrible technique where he would leap in the air like a gazelle before growing. Meaning the manager was screaming foul throw all the time. I kept my eye on it each time and it never was. But the uproar it was causing I just kept preying he wouldn't pick up the ball whenever there was a throw!
Isn't the highlighted part the very idea of an eyesore?
OP. Was the incident not a subconscious attempt to give yourself something else to beat yourself up about afterwards and make you feel better again? Have you become used to it and need it?
Serious stuff now: Humour is often the best tool for defusing this kind of situation, that you had, and now find yourself in. Live, learn, grow stronger. Worse is yet to come!
At best a yellow. Given that you were unsure who actually said it, and you took the defenders word for it, would for me make any sanction less than water tight. A word in the defender and goalkeepers ear about what is acceptable language and what isn't would have resolved the matter for me
I would have had a chat with him and pointed out that it was him who had let 13 goals in so he may want to get his own eyesight checked out !
Just about everything you've suggested here could be considered child abuse.....showing a red card has never, to my knowledge, been seen as child abuse
micky2001
Well-Known Member
@Brian Hamilton @DaveMac or anyone else who wants to answer - out of curiosity, what would your action be if said 11 year old called you a "blind bald/ginger/fat idiot" regarding a decision? I've had it before and got him subbed since it was a friendly. Was it a proper match I'd have had no problem giving a red.
Depends where, when and how it was said. Probably a stern talking to for that. After all, he's not wrong. I am fat and bald, my beard grows ginger and of course I'm an idiot, I'm a referee who puts himself in the situation where people think it's ok to abuse me because I have one pair of eyes.