I made a mistake by disallowing a penalty and I have reported my error to my County FA today

[Graham B]

Hello Everyone,
I made a huge error today.
I made a mistake by disallowing a penalty and I have reoprted my error to my County FA today in my game report. The game was an U16 Div2.
Basically, I awarded a penalty, and after the kick the ball rebounded off the keeper straight to the kicker who kicked it in. I awarded incorrectly an indirect free kick to the defending team and the game played on. I kept control and had about 20 minutes of the second half to finish.

After the game, I reported my error in my County Fa report. I also emailed an apology to both coaches in recognition of my error and will wait to see what disciplinary action is taken against me. I am a new referee for this season, keen, and now beating myself up over this error as I am very disappointed in myself. The coach of the team denied the goal emailed me back and was very understanding and said 'its just a mistake, we are all human and to not worry about it', but I am, and feel terrible.
Here is the email I sent...
"
Hello,

I made a mistake today regarding the penalty and should have allowed the goal. For this error, I am extremely sorry. I am emailing you to let you know I recognise the mistake and I can assure it will not happen again. I will learn from this error.

I have reported.myself and my mistake to the County FA for whatever disaplinary action they see fit. I have copied them into this email too to show I have emailed you in recognition.

This is what I have sent in.
" I made a mistake. I disallowed a goal on a penalty kick taken by '* removed for protection' The kicker took the kick, it rebounded off the keeper and the same kicker scored. I incorrectly gave an indirect free kick to the defending team. I am unsure what sanction you should give me and I am very sorry for this mistake."

I sincerely hope I have not ruined your day and can assure you this will not happen again. I can only hope you can forgive this error and I can move on.

Yours Sincerely
Graham"

I will find out in due course what action my county FA decide. I was having a good game other than this bad decision too.

Just sharing an experience and need advice how to forgive myself and move or even if I should be forgiven I guess.

Thank you for reading
Kindest regards
Graham

 

[one]

Hi Graham.

Kudos for recognizing your error and more so for admitting to it. You have done the right thing for reporting it. Also from my view point a formal apology to the teams is appropriate but some may disagree. Though my recommendation is to tone down the wording of the apology letter. It's a game at lower divisions after all. They still got out there and had a game.

I sure hope you are not sanctioned, especially as a new referee. And that you care about refereeing and the teams you referee. As much so for you to be regretful of your mistakes. And that should be enough.

 

[RefereeX]

Did this mistake affect the outcome of the game?

I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it! I’d be very surprised if the county FA take any disciplinary action against you as a first year referee. You’ve recognised your error and apologised, and at the end of the day the overall outcome is no different to if you had never awarded the penalty in the first place which would have been a far smaller error.

Assuming you’re now aware of this, but just to be clear, had the ball rebounded off the woodwork (therefore not touched an opposition player first) your actions would have been correct, but because the goalkeeper is a different player, the penalty taker is allowed to play the ball again.

 

[santa sangria]

Well done on acknowledging your mistake.

Don’t worry. We all make mistakes and great referees have made much bigger mistakes.

You will probably find that you league and referee managers probably don’t want you to contact teams directly like this, as it can create problems for them. It is good that you informed your county, as there is a chance a team makes a complaint and makes a case to reply the match (very, very unusual!).

Really don’t worry! You are in your first year. You are going to make more mistakes. And you are going to have to sell some crazy on field decisions in future. Remember it is amazing you spotted this.

 

[Graham B]

Did this mistake affect the outcome of the game?

I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it! I’d be very surprised if the county FA take any disciplinary action against you as a first year referee. You’ve recognised your error and apologised, and at the end of the day the overall outcome is no different to if you had never awarded the penalty in the first place which would have been a far smaller error.

Assuming you’re now aware of this, but just to be clear, had the ball rebounded off the woodwork (therefore not touched an opposition player first) your actions would have been correct, but because the goalkeeper is a different player, the penalty taker is allowed to play the ball again.

Thank you for your response. I made a mistake and will.learn from it. Kindest regards Graham

 

[Graham B]

Well done on acknowledging your mistake.

Don’t worry. We all make mistakes and great referees have made much bigger mistakYou will probably find that you league and referee managers probably don’t want you to contact teams directly like this, as it can create problems for them. It is good that you informed your county, as there is a chance a team makes a complaint and makes a case to reply the match (very, very unusual!).

Really don’t worry! You are in your first year. You are going to make more mistakes. And you are going to have to sell some crazy on field decisions in future. Remember it is amazing you spotted this.

Thank you for your reply. Honesty is the best policy I always say I hope my County FA see it that way. I do not think the affected team would have reported anything, but I feel I have to for transparency and honesty. Kindest regards Graham

 

[Graham B]

Did this mistake affect the outcome of the game?

I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it! I’d be very surprised if the county FA take any disciplinary action against you as a first year referee. You’ve recognised your error and apologised, and at the end of the day the overall outcome is no different to if you had never awarded the penalty in the first place which would have been a far smaller error.

Assuming you’re now aware of this, but just to be clear, had the ball rebounded off the woodwork (therefore not touched an opposition player first) your actions would have been correct, but because the goalkeeper is a different player, the penalty taker is allowed to play the ball again.

Regarding the outcome it could have created a 2- 2 draw had I allowed the goal

 

[Graham B]

Thank you for taking the time to respond, it's appreciated.

 

[Graham B]

Did this mistake affect the outcome of the game?

I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it! I’d be very surprised if the county FA take any disciplinary action against you as a first year referee. You’ve recognised your error and apologised, and at the end of the day the overall outcome is no different to if you had never awarded the penalty in the first place which would have been a far smaller error.

Assuming you’re now aware of this, but just to be clear, had the ball rebounded off the woodwork (therefore not touched an opposition player first) your actions would have been correct, but because the goalkeeper is a different player, the penalty taker is allowed to play the ball again.

Thank you for taking the time to respond. The outcome had I allowed the gol would have been 2-2. The coach/ Manager from team denied the goal responded to my email and was very sympathetic. He said this pasted below
"
Don’t worry about it at all. We all make mistakes.
I have already spoken to my team regarding the way that they spoke and behaved on the pitch today, reminding them in no uncertain terms that no matter what decision a referee makes they must always accept it and behave appropriately.

Genuinely don’t let it bother you. We’re all human."

I think this is very understanding and generous of him. I am still disappointed in myself as I take the role seriously and passionately. I do hope the FA are OK with me, I want to continue and be the best I am able. I will have to wait and see. I hope they get back to me quickly.
Thank you again for your time.
Kindest regards
Graham

 

[RefereeX]

Thank you for taking the time to respond. The outcome had I allowed the gol would have been 2-2. The coach/ Manager from team denied the goal responded to my email and was very sympathetic. He said this pasted below
"
Don’t worry about it at all. We all make mistakes.
I have already spoken to my team regarding the way that they spoke and behaved on the pitch today, reminding them in no uncertain terms that no matter what decision a referee makes they must always accept it and behave appropriately.

Genuinely don’t let it bother you. We’re all human."

I think this is very understanding and generous of him. I am still disappointed in myself as I take the role seriously and passionately. I do hope the FA are OK with me, I want to continue and be the best I am able. I will have to wait and see. I hope they get back to me quickly.
Thank you again for your time.
Kindest regards
Graham

What a first class attitude from the manager, we need more people like him in football.

Also, we need more referees like yourself, who will beat themselves up a little bit over a mistake. Sounds silly, but it shows you care. BUT it's done now, and it can't be changed, so move on and look forward to the next one.
I'm very sure the county FA will be absolutely fine about it. In the grass roots game, very little will come of it.

 

[Graham B]

What a attitude from the manager, we need more people like him in football.

Also, we need more referees like yourself, who will beat themselves up a little bit over a mistake. Sounds silly, but it shows you care. BUT it's done now, and it can't be changed, so move on and look forward to the next one.
I'm very sure the county FA will be absolutely fine about it. In the grass roots game, very little will come of it.

I agree, the coach/ Manager is excellen

What a first class attitude from the manager, we need more people like him in football.

Also, we need more referees like yourself, who will beat themselves up a little bit over a mistake. Sounds silly, but it shows you care. BUT it's done now, and it can't be changed, so move on and look forward to the next one.
I'm very sure the county FA will be absolutely fine about it. In the grass roots game, very little will come of it.

I agree, tge Manager/Coach is excellent (fortunately for me) . I do hope I am able to continue my referee journey after this.
Thank yiu again for your time and advice.
Kindest regards
Graham

 

[JamesL]

I agree, the coach/ Manager is excellen

I agree, tge Manager/Coach is excellent (fortunately for me) . I do hope I am able to continue my referee journey after this.
Thank yiu again for your time and advice.
Kindest regards
Graham

@Graham B you will absolutely be able to continue your journey. You aren't going to be removed from the role of referee over a mistake.

You are doing the right things, reflecting upon your games and considering how to put things right.

Nothing wrong with holding hands up and saying you got 1 wrong... I'd maybe not make a habit of following up incorrect decisions with clubs post match. Yes talk to mentors, coaches, RDO, other referees but imo asking for problems emailing the clubs. It looks like it's landed ok this time (proof will be in the pudding when you have either team next) but it might not in a future time so I sit on the side of not doing this.

 

[Graham B]

OK. Will do. Great advice for the future. Thank you. Kindest regards Graham

 

[Kes]

Don’t worry about it at all. We all make mistakes.
I have already spoken to my team regarding the way that they spoke and behaved on the pitch today, reminding them in no uncertain terms that no matter what decision a referee makes they must always accept it and behave appropriately.

Genuinely don’t let it bother you. We’re all human."

And there's the rub mate.

This coach, whilst probably angry at the time, is now in the same place as every other player and coach is in the morning after a game ie. it's over and they're now just simply looking ahead to their next one and not dwelling on it. That's exactly what you should now do. It's not a mistake you'll make again. Best of luck going forward.

 

[Graham B]

And there's the rub mate.

This coach, whilst probably angry at the time, is now in the same place as every other player and coach is in the morning after a game ie. it's over and they're now just simply looking ahead to their next one and not dwelling on it. That's exactly what you should now do. It's not a mistake you'll make again. Best of luck going forward.

No, I won't!

 

[socal lurker]

Just want to add, this is a common mistake/misunderstanding. If it had been the post, it’s the right call. It’s a natural over generalization that is part of learning, you are far from the first ref to make this mistake and you’re far from the last ref to make it. Not at all a mistake to beat yourself up over,

 

[Graham B]

Just want to add, this is a common mistake/misunderstanding. If it had been the post, it’s the right call. It’s a natural over generalization that is part of learning, you are far from the first ref to make this mistake and you’re far from the last ref to make it. Not at all a mistake to beat yourself up over,

Thank you for you help a d support.All the best Graham

 

[The Ginger Ref]

Hats off to the OP for admitting their mistake and going about rectifying the mistake. On this occasion it sounds like the coach took it the right way.

Not sure i'd be offering the gesture of a written apology to the clubs, but I would notify the CFA to cover my own back more than anything. Think i'd treat it a bit like an extraordinary report, tell the CFA what happened as you saw it and leave them to deal with the outcome. IMO by directly admitting fault to the club(s), you are giving them ammunition to demand the match be replayed and even possibly demand retrospective against you as an official.

(Similar to having a car accident, don't admit fault. Leave it to the insurers to decide the outcome).

But most of all, don't dwell on it! It happened, you learnt from it and it's all part of development.

 

[RefereeX]

I also once wrote apologising to a club regarding a penalty incident (albeit mine was poor judgement rather than being incorrect in law)

A player was inside the area and a defender slid in and wiped the player out as he got the shot away. The shot lifted off the foot of a close by defender and flew upwards. I blew the whistle awarding the penalty, just as the ball looped over the diving goalkeepers head and in to the net.

It all seemed to happen in slow motion, but in reality it wasn't very long. Of course, they missed the penalty. I wrote and apologised for being too quick to whistle and the club appreciated my taking the time to do so. I think most clubs thoroughly appreciate it, but there are those that would try to use it against you.

 

[DJIC]

Well done for admitting an error in law, owning up, move on with a positive attitude for your next game.

if you want to discipline yourself..... your sentence is 'reading the LoTG every day for rest of this month' (joking!)