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Captains

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It's nothing to do with the ability of the referee in this case. All I'm saying is that in this lovely place called Hull, if you spoke that nicely the first thing the captains would say to their teams is "god this refs a right posh tw@t" :p

hardly equates to loss of match control
 
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On this occasion I have to agree with @haywain - there's nothing wrong with being polite! A lot of referees say that they swear on the pitch to try and stay at the same level as the players so they can relate to them which could help their match control. However I think you gave to rise above that, and so if you are polite and fairly formal then you can be seen to be morally better. Frankly, I take 'posh ****' as a compliment, inferring it as 'I bow to your superior intellect and intelligence'. Whether or not that's they mean I don't care - if that's the worst insult you get then you've got off lightly!! :)
 
When I first started I used to take the chat really seriously, I could see the players laughing at me which didn't exactly aid my match control, Now I try and add some banter into it and it has helped :p
 
When I first started I used to take the chat really seriously, I could see the players laughing at me which didn't exactly aid my match control, Now I try and add some banter into it and it has helped :p
For me, the less said the better.
 
This all depends on your personal style - trying to get involved in banter can back fire in the wrong circumstances!
 
I never go too far, one example was I knew one captain had failed the course test twice (yes I know) so I said I know how I'm basing my decisions tonight his name failed the refs course twice so when he appeals I won't give anything, ( you had to be there) but we had a good chuckle about it,........
 
I've changed significantly what I say nowadays. Used to be a long spiel but, as mentioned, they're probably not listening.

Now, it goes like this:

*Handshakes all round*
"Lads, one thing from me and that's all. Talk to us how you'd like us to talk to you, and we'll have no problems."
*Hand coin to home captain*
"Toss and catch please and away call it in the air"
*Look at result of coin toss*
"Your choice of end *picks* and your kick"
"Enjoy lads, see ya"
Very much agree with Dan, like that a lot!
 
I'm with you Ryan, that's exactly how i do it, it's all about that mutual respect, to be fair the respect has usually gone after about 10 minutes, but then you speak to people how you'd expect to be spoken to, until the duty kn*b ruins your afternoon by gobbing off
 
It's nothing to do with the ability of the referee in this case. All I'm saying is that in this lovely place called Hull, if you spoke that nicely the first thing the captains would say to their teams is "god this refs a right posh tw@t" :p

Oh there's no denying that I'm a right posh **** :p As I said, I'm just glad I don't ref in your neck of the woods haha.
 
Agree with the above, and we have this conversation a lot on here - keep it basic. I will make one point though, if you go for this approach (which I always do!) make sure you give off confidence (start off with a very loud whistle and shout for the captains for example) - if a referee doesn't say anything to the captains, , has a weak whistle / voice to bring them in, keeps himself to himself, body language etc... then you could quite easily give off a nervous look, which I am sure many captains / teams will take advantage of!
 
At cup games I'll just confirm with them details (ET and pens), and at academy games I explain that I have no ARs so I can only give what I am certain, but I'll be fair to both teams, that way it helps prevent arguments during the match. Other than that, I don't say anything.
 
You can't possibly know that had you not said anything to him pre-match, he would have definitely argued with you.
 
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But as a referee you have to find what works for you, I having a word pre-match has eliminated issues before why change... If it's not broken don't fix it.
 
You cannot know it has eliminated issues - You can't see or know what might have happened if you had said nothing or said something different.

However, If you find your way works for you, then great. Not arguing that part. Just the ability to see into alternative realities where the possible consequences of actions not taken taken are player out :p
 
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