Dissent from players and coaches

[pdhmobile]

Hi all

My son (16 yrs old) reffed a u12 game on Sunday and he said from the first whistle both managers and players were shouting and claiming for everything all game. He said it's the worst game he's done.

I know we say we have tools to deal with that sort of stuff but 2 things sprung to mind,

Would you YC multiple players from both teams at U12

Isn't it too much to expect a minor to stand up to coaches of both teams and issue cautions??

 

[RefRyanAus]

It is poor behaviour and it shouldn’t happen… but sadly it does. Under age referees shouldn’t have to deal with it… but sadly they do. No problem issuing multiple cards and using sin bin as appropriate - even at this age. Dissent is a cancer to referee authority (at all age groups) so it is important to act early and not let it fester. Many younger referees are more susceptible because their skill level is lower, they have less confidence in their abilities, and they can have more difficulty asserting authority. We all have difficulty games like this and it takes great resilience to bounce back, learn from the experience and apply those learnings to the next game. I always remind young referees that it is a great service but difficult pastime they are entering into and it says a lot about them as individuals that they can control 22 players and 2 coaching groups on any given day. Tips for next game - appear more confident than he feels, get involved early, close down the dissent when it first happens, use the different steps of intervention available in his tool kit.

 

[one]

Firstly I admire you for supporting your son through this 'journey'. Both my sons refereed in their teens. One only did a year as it wasn't for him, and that's all good. The other continued until his mid 20s.

Refereeing, for myself and for me supporting and encouraging my sons, was not so much about applying rules etc. It's about how you grow as a person and the life expereiences. It is the lessons you learn through adversity.

In terms of his expereience, I agree it is very difficult for teenagers to manage adults, especially adults with no sense of their social responsibilities. One advice I have been giving new young referees is that once you are in the middle you are the boss. Forget about your age and the other's age. Be the boss but be a nice boss. Bosses have to be tough sometimes and make hard decisions.

In terms of how to deal with it, there is good advice above. I feel if he manages the coaches early the players would be fine as they follow their leaders. There is also good advice above.

One thing I'll add, like all of us, it's much harder to deal with a difficult situation the first time you face it. He will be much more prepared if it happens again.

 

[Kent Ref]

Sometimes when you card player 1 SOMETIMES incident 2 and 3 do not happen.

Managers behaving like this is disgraceful and unacceptable.

I hope you or your son has e-mailed the league to let them know.