Today I reffed my first game which was an under 13's game. I received countless amounts of sarcastic comments and complaints from the players. Even when a player was simply touched by another player he was asking for a foul and giving me abuse when I didn't give it. I had to threaten one with a yellow card, but I'm just unsure how much I should take before actually booking one of these players. Yes they are young, but they need to be taught that they can't disrespect the referee. Any advice?
Junior/Youth Dishing out cards
- Thread starter Harry Sanger
- Start date
RegalRef
Politically Incorrect
The only advice I can give you mate is that you find your own levels with experience. There's no definite right or wrong.
If you're getting a lot of questioning from players all across the pitch it can help to make an example of the worst culprit, by either pulling his captain across and giving him his last verbal warning, or going straight for a caution. It sets the tone with the other players as well, not just the one involved, and can help a great deal.
Some refs on here are a lot quicker to punish backchat that me, some don't act as quickly as I would, that's just a matter of opinion.
You'll find your own way in time, in the mean time just act firmly but fairly. If it's dissent try to give a loud verbal warning first where possible, if you then have to issue a caution you always have the backup of 'I did warn you, but you chose not to listen and carry on'.
Hope that helps.
If you're getting a lot of questioning from players all across the pitch it can help to make an example of the worst culprit, by either pulling his captain across and giving him his last verbal warning, or going straight for a caution. It sets the tone with the other players as well, not just the one involved, and can help a great deal.
Some refs on here are a lot quicker to punish backchat that me, some don't act as quickly as I would, that's just a matter of opinion.
You'll find your own way in time, in the mean time just act firmly but fairly. If it's dissent try to give a loud verbal warning first where possible, if you then have to issue a caution you always have the backup of 'I did warn you, but you chose not to listen and carry on'.
Hope that helps.
Thanks mate!
Mainly the away team, but they were loosing 8-1, so it doesn't surprise me they were trying to blame me and moan about every decision
Yep you'll get that a lot with teams that are losing with scorelines like that. Take it with a pinch of salt.
deusex
RefChat Addict
From your comments, it's clear the away team needed more cards (or maybe just one) than you gave them.
Remember how crap it feels to come away from a match when the players have taken the p*ss for 90 mins and use that to give you the strength to issue that much needed caution the next time this happens.
You being more specific in telling us what they said would help a lot. Some comments are cautions EVERY time.
Remember how crap it feels to come away from a match when the players have taken the p*ss for 90 mins and use that to give you the strength to issue that much needed caution the next time this happens.
You being more specific in telling us what they said would help a lot. Some comments are cautions EVERY time.
CapnBloodbeard
RefChat Addict
Young teams can actually be quite difficult to handle sometimes, especially if they're a team of smart alecks. I once refereed an U/12 team that I really struggled with, because I had never faced that level of dissent and unsporting behaviour from that age and I was caught off guard. The thing about this team, fairly high level local team (by the way, we play full-sized games from U/10 up), local A grade. But I could see they were well coached into thinking they were a much higher, older grade in terms of how they act. I mean, the way they commit cynical fouls, even how they try to get under the opponent's skin. I even found there was a lot of dissent, but it wasn't just mindless whinging - it was like they had been coached into how to dissent effectively to get under my skin.
This team copped a couple of cards for dissent, and I think a RC for VC. I refereed them a few times later in the season, and they'd normally cop some for dissent (one particular scenario, the player clapped at the first card - I had a strong word, but this was a team that knew how to abuse the fact that a lot of referees would think 'oh, they're just kids' and keep the cards in the pocket). After the match, the opposing coach said he was really surprised I didn't respond to the clapping with the second card. Regardless, I didn't lose control of these later matches.
Basically, the kids were a bunch of prima donnas, and the parents were exactly what you'd expect from this. I learned from that game is that sometimes the best thing you can do is dish out the cards.
Personally, my tolerance level for dissent, aggression and clearly intentional unsporting acts is much lower at these ages than at higher grades. I'll still try to use roadblocks, but I have no problems with booking kids who want to mouth off - and this is the age where they love to test authority.
Try to get a feel if they're just complaining because they're upset, or if they're trying to impress their mates. At times, calling a player over (to neutral territory) can help calm him down as he gets a little embarrassed while everybody watches him walk.
If it's personal, public or persistent it needs to be dealt with. If they're just appealing, keep an eye on it and if it's happening a lot, pull the players up. It may be that simply talking to the players can be enough to handle the appeals, or maybe not.
This team copped a couple of cards for dissent, and I think a RC for VC. I refereed them a few times later in the season, and they'd normally cop some for dissent (one particular scenario, the player clapped at the first card - I had a strong word, but this was a team that knew how to abuse the fact that a lot of referees would think 'oh, they're just kids' and keep the cards in the pocket). After the match, the opposing coach said he was really surprised I didn't respond to the clapping with the second card. Regardless, I didn't lose control of these later matches.
Basically, the kids were a bunch of prima donnas, and the parents were exactly what you'd expect from this. I learned from that game is that sometimes the best thing you can do is dish out the cards.
Personally, my tolerance level for dissent, aggression and clearly intentional unsporting acts is much lower at these ages than at higher grades. I'll still try to use roadblocks, but I have no problems with booking kids who want to mouth off - and this is the age where they love to test authority.
Try to get a feel if they're just complaining because they're upset, or if they're trying to impress their mates. At times, calling a player over (to neutral territory) can help calm him down as he gets a little embarrassed while everybody watches him walk.
If it's personal, public or persistent it needs to be dealt with. If they're just appealing, keep an eye on it and if it's happening a lot, pull the players up. It may be that simply talking to the players can be enough to handle the appeals, or maybe not.
Mewcenary
Well-Known Member
Empathy for the game, such as identifying the mood of a team losing 8-1, does not mean you should ever sacrifice match control.
If you are receiving 'countless' sarcastic comments etc then it indicates it has gone too far. Get hold of it early.
Step them up. First comment, have a word. Second comment, get the captain in, make it clear you are not going to tolerate this. After that, get the card out.
In the situation where a team is generally being uppity, it need not be the same player who makes the subsequent comments - they can take it for the team. It can also be a powerful message to bring the captain in _on his/her own_ and decisively say they need to control their team.
One small thing: Never threaten a yellow card. It gives you no wiggle room. Slightly more neutral phrases like, "I can't talk to you like this again" or "You're giving me nowhere to go" can help.
If you are receiving 'countless' sarcastic comments etc then it indicates it has gone too far. Get hold of it early.
Step them up. First comment, have a word. Second comment, get the captain in, make it clear you are not going to tolerate this. After that, get the card out.
In the situation where a team is generally being uppity, it need not be the same player who makes the subsequent comments - they can take it for the team. It can also be a powerful message to bring the captain in _on his/her own_ and decisively say they need to control their team.
One small thing: Never threaten a yellow card. It gives you no wiggle room. Slightly more neutral phrases like, "I can't talk to you like this again" or "You're giving me nowhere to go" can help.
I think it's important as well, and this isn't me being patronising I promise, to remember that u-13 will see you, aged 15, a bit differently to for example me the nearly 40 year old, increasingly greying, sarcastic teacher who weighs up on a Saturday or Sunday. In a sense you probably need to take the firmer approach that we would use in open age football as the relative ages are important.
I do a fair bit of U13/14 games, and I've found that getting both teams together just before they do the respect handshake, with the managers together to warn them that language is a no no, and will result in you getting booked seems to do the trick.
I'll still go down the warning / card route if someone does get out of line, but I seem to have very few issues.
I'll still go down the warning / card route if someone does get out of line, but I seem to have very few issues.
I echo this. I'm 17 and the U13's still didn't take me that seriously, answering back and having a go at decisions. Even cards didn't change the whole teams attitude in some in some cases.
Definitely be firm with them. I used to think that if a teacher would give them a warning up on the board for what they said then it warranted a yellow.
Also, look at for coaches. They'll think you can be more easily swayed since you're young. Always send in misconduct reports if they deserve it.
CapnBloodbeard
RefChat Addict
Not having seen you referee, I wonder how you carry/present yourself on the field? Looking and sounding confident and certain will go a long way. Have you had any mentoring / coaching with these young ages?