Difficult U12 game - What to do about parents?

[pdhmobile]

Hi everyone

I covered a U12 9 a side game this morning for my son who was ill (I normally do 11 a side) and found it quite annoying how much the kids shouted and questioned everything from throw ins to penalty appeals and then talking between themselves saying we know we aren't going to anything from this ref.

Then midway through the 2nd half the home manager comes onto the pitch for a injury and says if the away parents continue talking and shouting as they are he is going to pull his team off altogether.

Anyway the match continues and finishes with a 4-3 home win.

I did play on a offside appeal for the winning goal that obviously the away team weren't happy with.

Cue full time and away manager going on about the offside, as he walked off I'm sure he called me a cheat, I called him back and asked him what he said and he said nothing.

As I make my off the pitch and to my car, cue abuse from the away parents, everything from you missed 2 offsides there, you had a nightmare there, how much did they pay you, that's the worse ref I've seen in 60 years, call yourself a referee etc etc.

So officially I haven't issued any sanctions but I feel I need to report the parents of the away team.

Not sure how to go about this and what my fellow refs think of the whole situation?

Cheers

 

[Gabriel]

how much did they pay you

This is essentially accusing you of cheating. Report them

 

[one]

Agree with Gabz. But in your report give the full context as you have in your post here. It sounds like a pattern. If enough referees report them and hopefully they get fined, they may get the message.

 

[ChasObserverRefDeveloper]

For dissent during the game, tell the coach that if the players continue to show dissent they will be sin-binned. Give the coach the chance to spread that message,
For unacceptable behaviour by spectators during the game, suspend play, then tell the home coach what you want done (e.g. the man in the donkey jacket needs to stop the verbal abuse). The coach is responsible for the behaviour at the game, and should have Respect stewards available to deal with this sort of issue (assuming that you are in England?). If they don't stop, abandon and report.
For the post-match behaviour, two reports: (1) Contact the Referee Appointments Secretary of the League to advise them of the behaviour; (2) Using the misconduct system which that League's referees use, file a report as an Extraordinary Incident, giving full and unexpurgated details of any unacceptable language, etc.
You owe all of that to next week's referee, who may not have the maturity to deal with it. Thank you.
Jump back on here if you get stuck - there are a lot of experienced report writers in this group!

 

[socal lurker]

You owe all of that to next week's referee, who may not have the maturity to deal with it. Thank you.

THIS!!!

I think too often experienced refs let things go because “I can handle it.” Especially at younger ages, we need to set the tone and teach overexcited parents (and coaches) what appropriate behavior is. We can do it, and that makes it better for the newbies who don’t have the skills—and may just quit before developing them if they have to deal with this kind of d of crap.

I don’t know why the protocols are in England, but here it is pretty normal for refs in youth games to remove inappropriately behaving parents. (More precisely to tell the coach that the game will not continue u til the coach has the parent removed.) I have had far, fR more parents removed than I have had red cards or coach expulsions. And I would say that on more than half of them, the parents from the SAME TEAM thanked me, as that knucklehead had been ruining things for the kids all season.