The Ref Stop

Cautions in youth football part 2

I think most of us agree, we wouldn’t take abuse in the street so why would we on a pitch!! Especially in youth football - whilst players are learning we want positive encouragement not negative

Not just us but, if thats the player to coach when told to switch from midfield to defense
Or of course when told by mum its dinner time

that example quoted is a red at each and every level.
 
The Ref Stop
Good chance am going straight red here, am there to officiate a sporting event, not be told to feck off by a 16yo.
Spur of momenr or not, am not there to be sworn at.

Just saw the snooker spat, if O Sullivan had said " feck off ref" he be disqualified from the event, thus losing the final, probably be fined £100,000 and told a repeat would mean a lifetime ban.

So what do we do in football when a 16 yo tells us to feck off? Send them to the naughty step for ten mins. Mad. Weak weak refereeing.
Geography has a part to play ref in certain places and swearing at or about something at above maybe 14 is somewhat normal even outside football that’s not weak reffing it’s knowing context.
 
Geography has a part to play ref in certain places and swearing at or about something at above maybe 14 is somewhat normal even outside football that’s not weak reffing it’s knowing context.

If you accept being told to " feck off ref " by a 16 yo, then you need go re-examine context.

Thats not swearing, thats outright abusive.

If you are tolerating that ( not saying you are, but if you are), you are as much to blame for indiscipline as the player.

if its normal, then simply proof if you tolerate misbehaviour, it does eventually become the normal,
 
If you accept being told to " feck off ref " by a 16 yo, then you need go re-examine context.

Thats not swearing, thats outright abusive.

If you are tolerating that ( not saying you are, but if you are), you are as much to blame for indiscipline as the player.

if its normal, then simply proof if you tolerate misbehaviour, it does eventually become the normal,
This. I come from an area where, growing up, swearing was a normal part of vocab. In the schoolyard, kids are gonna be swearing all the time. We’re not there to be some moral protectors and go harsh because it’s children that are swearing.

This is different. The player has very directly told the ref to “f off.” No possible way you can call that anything but a red. Back to the schoolyard example, what do you think would happen if a teacher gave a detention to a pupil and they loudly told the teacher to “**** off Mr/Mrs whatever.”

Fine line between “naughty words” and abuse but this more than steps over that line
 
This. I come from an area where, growing up, swearing was a normal part of vocab. In the schoolyard, kids are gonna be swearing all the time. We’re not there to be some moral protectors and go harsh because it’s children that are swearing.

This is different. The player has very directly told the ref to “f off.” No possible way you can call that anything but a red. Back to the schoolyard example, what do you think would happen if a teacher gave a detention to a pupil and they loudly told the teacher to “**** off Mr/Mrs whatever.”

Fine line between “naughty words” and abuse but this more than steps over that line

My mouth can be a sewer and am as open minded and aware of industrial language and stay in, lets say,a lesser desirable area. Working class, apart from the lack of those who work!

In no geographical region is a 16 yo clearly telling the referee to f off during a sporting event even up for debate

what next, let them off with head butting you , afterall, its the norm for your area?!!



if anyone tolerates this, you seriously need to reconsider putting on your badge this weekend, you are disgracing sport, football, and, yourself,
 
On a side note, this seems to happen fairly often. Other week I was watching my brothers U13 team play away and it was a feisty game. Someone on the opposition team lost it over a foul being given against him and began screaming at the ref.

“Go **** yourself referee, that was never a ****ing foul are you ****ing blind.”

Guess which card was shown? The “old school” referee called him over in a booming voice and said “for foul and abusive language, I’m showing you a yellow card”

Opposition manager was complaining because he felt like the player should have been warned or been allowed to be subbed off. I say to my Dad that it should have been a red, but my brothers team parents agreed with the ref.

“Foul and abusive language can’t be tolerated, ref has dealt with it well without ruining kids game”
“Surely a red for language at this age is harsh”
were amongst the comments received. One parent asked me, in almost incredulous shock
“Would you red card for that”

When I answered yes, she laughed and said “oh I’ll have to tell Little Timmy that he needs to keep his mouth shut if you’re reffing the next home game”

Who knows why Little Timmy would’ve previously thought it ok to repeatedly swear, tell someone to go **** themselves and accuse them of being blind but there you go.
Its always the poor old ref who has 'ruined the game', not the player who spouted that stuff.

Like 95% (or more, I hope) on here, that's a red, whatever age the player is.
 
On a side note, this seems to happen fairly often. Other week I was watching my brothers U13 team play away and it was a feisty game. Someone on the opposition team lost it over a foul being given against him and began screaming at the ref.

“Go **** yourself referee, that was never a ****ing foul are you ****ing blind.”

Guess which card was shown? The “old school” referee called him over in a booming voice and said “for foul and abusive language, I’m showing you a yellow card”

Opposition manager was complaining because he felt like the player should have been warned or been allowed to be subbed off. I say to my Dad that it should have been a red, but my brothers team parents agreed with the ref.

“Foul and abusive language can’t be tolerated, ref has dealt with it well without ruining kids game”
“Surely a red for language at this age is harsh”
were amongst the comments received. One parent asked me, in almost incredulous shock
“Would you red card for that”

When I answered yes, she laughed and said “oh I’ll have to tell Little Timmy that he needs to keep his mouth shut if you’re reffing the next home game”

Who knows why Little Timmy would’ve previously thought it ok to repeatedly swear, tell someone to go **** themselves and accuse them of being blind but there you go.
So even though foul and abusive language is a red how would you put that through on the system that you only have a yellow?
 
When it comes to OFFINABUS, there is opinion of course and I respect that. But a 16 year old screaming **** off at you. I’m struggling to see anyway that isn’t a red. Again, I come from an area where “industrial language” is normal language. Every 16 year old knows if they shout **** off to a teacher they will face serious consequences. If they shout it to their coach, even in the heat of the game, they will likely get subbed off and face consequence.

Why should referees be the only authority figure where we don’t take action other than “that wasn’t very nice, take 10 minutes out”

Don’t be Last Weeks Ref is all I’m saying. The 17 year old who shows a red card next week for the same thing is going to struggle because that wasn’t what the ref last week did.
 
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