The Ref Stop

Junior/Youth But she won the ball first....

J

jertzee

Member
Compared to some other refs on here today I think I got an easy game by comparison.

Top of the table clash,end to end game, played at very fast pace at this level with few players taking a touch.
Add to the fact it is a local derby,lots of parents screaming for pretty much the whole game and the players are up for it I knew it wasn't going to be the easiest of rides.

First half was ok - competitive but fair.

Second half the away team step up their performance but also their challenges.
Having warned their centre half she then wins a 50/50 ball in the penalty area but brings down the forward in the same movement ( a soft penalty but contact enough to put the forward on the deck)
No forwards shout for a penalty, the away team CAR obviously doesn't give it, but I do.
Cue 5 minutes of abuse from the away manager as his team go 1-0 down from the penalty.
I heard about 5 players saying that "she got the ball first"...the same from the touchlines.

AAARGGHHH!!!

Also plenty of shouting at me from the parents.

From now on every time I give a decision against the away team all I hear is "Oh re..bla blah" from the manager.

His team equalise and 1-1 is how it finishes.

Not surprisingly he doesn't shake my hand, while the home team manager thanks me and applauds me for not changing my mind (also for an indirect free kick from a back pass I also gave against the away team).

The thing is I am one of these refs that blocks shouts from the touchline, parents and managers, and have never had to have a word with the manager as it never got that bad.

Today I couldn't hear what he said due to the noise from the parents but I knew it was going on for some time.
I assume that I can't say anything now, or report him due to the fact I can't actually report what he said?

Add to the fact that one of the parents shouted abuse at me as I left the car park, saying I ruined the game, only being calmed down by another parent I feel annoyed - is this one to put down to experience or is there anything that I can do to either make me feel better?
 
The Ref Stop
jertzee said:
Compared to some other refs on here today I think I got an easy game by comparison.

Top of the table clash,end to end game, played at very fast pace at this level with few players taking a touch.
Add to the fact it is a local derby,lots of parents screaming for pretty much the whole game and the players are up for it I knew it wasn't going to be the easiest of rides.

First half was ok - competitive but fair.

Second half the away team step up their performance but also their challenges.
Having warned their centre half she then wins a 50/50 ball in the penalty area but brings down the forward in the same movement ( a soft penalty but contact enough to put the forward on the deck)
No forwards shout for a penalty, the away team CAR obviously doesn't give it, but I do.
Cue 5 minutes of abuse from the away manager as his team go 1-0 down from the penalty.
I heard about 5 players saying that "she got the ball first"...the same from the touchlines.

AAARGGHHH!!!

Also plenty of shouting at me from the parents.

From now on every time I give a decision against the away team all I hear is "Oh re..bla blah" from the manager.

His team equalise and 1-1 is how it finishes.

Not surprisingly he doesn't shake my hand, while the home team manager thanks me and applauds me for not changing my mind (also for an indirect free kick from a back pass I also gave against the away team).

The thing is I am one of these refs that blocks shouts from the touchline, parents and managers, and have never had to have a word with the manager as it never got that bad.

Today I couldn't hear what he said due to the noise from the parents but I knew it was going on for some time.
I assume that I can't say anything now, or report him due to the fact I can't actually report what he said?

Add to the fact that one of the parents shouted abuse at me as I left the car park, saying I ruined the game, only being calmed down by another parent I feel annoyed - is this one to put down to experience or is there anything that I can do to either make me feel better?
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If you want to be popular then it's time to hang up the whistle. It's never going to be an easy job and all you can do is develop coping mechanisms to block out how you feel when the abuse starts DURING the game. After the game however you can advise the club that you will be reporting the verbal abuse received and follow through on this by reporting misconduct by the spectators. You could also contact the Respect officer for the league, if they have one, and report your thoughts to them. If they are worth their salt, they will approach the club to advise them of the poor behaviour by their spectators.
 
jertzee said:
Having warned their centre half she then wins a 50/50 ball in the penalty area but brings down the forward in the same movement ( a soft penalty but contact enough to put the forward on the deck)
No forwards shout for a penalty, the away team CAR obviously doesn't give it, but I do.
Click to expand...

Must say, and I'll be moaned at on here for saying it, but if none of the attacking team are asking for a penalty I'm not giving it!
 
Ooooooooooo that is not a part pf the laws criteria. I hate when players say "but nobody asked for it!!!"

It's either a penalty in your eyes or not! :) in your eyes. Nobody else counts.
 
I'm aware it wont be popular on here. But penalty area certain things have to happen before I'm giving it! If a player stays on their feet I'm not blowing and if no one asks then I'm not giving it! To be fair I've never had it happen. Players will claim for anything inside the box!
 
DaveMac said:
I'm aware it wont be popular on here. But penalty area certain things have to happen before I'm giving it! If a player stays on their feet I'm not blowing and if no one asks then I'm not giving it! To be fair I've never had it happen. Players will claim for anything inside the box!
Click to expand...

Ouch. I think ive just bitten right through my tongue :p
 
Ah too much fun to be had on a Sunday evening!! Of course I'm only joking. ALthough I do stick by my comment that in the area for even the slightest thing players are claiming a penalty, so dont think I would ever be confronted with the chance to give a penalty without an appeal!
 
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DaveMac said:
I'm aware it wont be popular on here. But penalty area certain things have to happen before I'm giving it! If a player stays on their feet I'm not blowing and if no one asks then I'm not giving it! To be fair I've never had it happen. Players will claim for anything inside the box!
Click to expand...
Ah, I see. So, you're one of those referees that rewards divers and punishes players who do the right thing and stay on their feet? I'm so sick of this approach, it's such a screwed up way to approach the game. I know at the elite level in particular referees take that approach, but it's absolutely atrocious, it really is. You don't need to be flattened for a foul to occur - but like I said, it's encouraging diving and punishing players for doing the wrong thing


DaveMac said:
Must say, and I'll be moaned at on here for saying it, but if none of the attacking team are asking for a penalty I'm not giving it!
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Excuse me while I throw something ;-)
Referee needs to have the balls to make the decision himself. Sure, sometimes I've gone to award a free kick, especially for something like DHB (where I know the wrong angle makes it look like it hit his hand when it didn't), only to have nobody appeal and then I've thought 'umm...maybe not'. I guess it comes down to your level of certainty.

For a penalty, if you're certain, you should be on the whistle immediately, no time to even consider appeals (naturally appeals are normally faster due to the simpler decision making process players and spectators have here).

But I remember one match, attacker went down in the box, nobody appealed, I didn't give it, don't even think I shouted for it. It wasn't until a few moments later that I copped the flak for it - sometimes players think it's so clear that they figure they don't need to appeal; the referee is just going to give it.

We don't want to screw teams over just because they actually respect the referee - it also penalises teams that are less likely to appeal/dissent (particularly at lower grades where some teams barely speak)
 
A few seasons ago i refereed a sunday league mens match, and the forward was standing in the penalty area waiting for a corner to come in.
Stood next to him was a defender,as the ball came over i noticed the defender pulling on the shorts of the forward stopping him from moving,the forward was stationary,on his feet but having his shorts pulled i blew the whistle and awarded a penalty......the offending defender just jogged away accepting the decision as he knew what he done...........so yes i agree they dont have to be clattered for a penalty
 
Nobody asked for it is one of my pet hate with teams

I couldn't care less. I see it, I give it. Job done. :D

Other local refs had said I am wrong. No surprises. That is not a consideration for me. I am either right or wrong. If I see it and am wrong, then fair enough I conceed. Otherwise whatever decision I make stands. I am 100% behind whatever decision I make.
 
I have to say, I'm with DaveMac on this. Been told it by a level 3 referee and I agree with him - if no one wants it, don't give it. Why create unnecessary sh*t for yourself?
 
A colleague put this into perspective for me.

Nobody asks for it - You see it. You don't give it. However, everyone outside of the pitch sees it. You have killed your credibility and are now a soft ref who cannot make a decison.

Can you live with that?
 
hattersfan said:
I have to say, I'm with DaveMac on this. Been told it by a level 3 referee and I agree with him - if no one wants it, don't give it. Why create unnecessary sh*t for yourself?
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A level 3 referee operates at a totally different level of football from you and the players have much different expectations of the match officials. I've watched level 3 referees and some level 4 referees when they have dropped into a lower level of football, say for a tense local derby and they can't cope as well as those who referee regularly at that lower level.
 
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