The Ref Stop

Another day at the Zoo!

I sound defeatist and for that I apologise

That said, if you cannot control a game with 12 year olds then you cannot control an adult game and you are risking your confidence, reputation and possibly actual confrontation by continuing.

Maybe concentrate on watching games until you are able to drive, thus picking up valuable tips on how to deal and not deal with things
Only a fool goes into the gladitoral arena without armour


No schools around that you can officiate at ?
 
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The Ref Stop
I sound defeatist and for that I apologise

That said, if you cannot control a game with 12 year olds then you cannot control an adult game and you are risking your confidence, reputation and possibly actual confrontation by continuing.

Maybe concentrate on watching games until you are able to drive, thus picking up valuable tips on how to deal and not deal with things
Only a fool goes into the gladitoral arena without armour


No schools around that you can officiate at ?
I do do schools games and they are no brother
 
Well I have just done a game today and it was a better game it finished 2 2 with 3 yellows and 1 straight red.
 
Sack this league off. Week on week this happens to you, it can’t be enjoyable
 
Well I have just done a game today and it was a better game it finished 2 2 with 3 yellows and 1 straight red.
To put into context @JoeMaloney5 , I've shown roughly 65 yellows, two reds (and one Report) in roughly 65 games (25xOA, 40xYouth)
Some of the youth games I could referee by flashing my indicators and beeping the horn whilst sat in the car, but the OA league is difficult. Point being, my experience of refereeing is on a different planet from yours. If i still lived in the NE, I'd be keen to come and see what the devil is going on, because i don't think it's safe for you to continue on this path. I refereed Premier top v 3rd yesterday, but it's taken 25 games for my RefSec to trust that i'm able enough
 
Can’t remember exactly my worst behaved season but I’d guess on sundays at 2 yellows per game and a red about every 3rd game. Saturdays were far more serene and probably half that!

Towards the end it was a fraction of that as they’d got the message!
 
Can’t remember exactly my worst behaved season but I’d guess on sundays at 2 yellows per game and a red about every 3rd game. Saturdays were far more serene and probably half that!

Towards the end it was a fraction of that as they’d got the message!
**I could referee by flashing my indicators and beeping the horn whilst sat in the car**
I think I may have stolen this one from you @Sheffields Finest!
 
Junior Football is even worse than the adults and I'm restricted as I don't drive so they are the only 2 league accessible to me ... I still enjoy it

Well, that's ok.

I didn't train on the youth circuits for the same reason, didn't enjoy them. I went straight into adult games and did my learning there. No reason why you can't do the same. I would look into a mentor or getting some assessments though - those will shape you in the right direction. I don't know if you can request them in England, but might be worth asking at the referee's society if there's help available for that? (I mention it as, my first season back last season I was given a one-off assessment to make sure I was on the right track, even though I wasn't on for promotion.)

One thing I will say is that alot of people seem genuinely surprised by the behaviour of the players mentioned because it's so much better in the local league's where they're from. That will be the truth and we're all products of our environment. I can categorically say that there are still league's with behaviour patterns like Joe describes, particularly in city centres.

I agree. I am always impressed with referees managing to keep under 1 card per game. You only have to look at my own statistics below to see how rare that is round my way.

I know in my county discipline has gone through the roof this season, lots of cautions and dismissals and misconduct reports. Enough that our county is taking action with a written warning and some hefty fines. Two clubs hit with £500 last month from what I understand. And two weekends ago, up in Neath there was something in the air, as we apparently had a referee assault and three other incidents leading to bans in excess of 3-6months...

Sometimes people go a bit nuts. But, I'd be a bit worried if punch ups and things kicking off was happening on a regular basis. Not just for 'quality' of refereeing, I'm thinking how it would affect the referee themselves mentally to have to see and deal with that on a repeated basis. It would affect me, for sure.
 
The ref sec has just appointed me to a semi final game , my first semi final game in fact I can't wait don't know if you lot think this is good or bad but I'm happy for The opportunity non the less
 
The show of confidence from your ref sec is good. I highly recommend to find someone to mentor you in this game.

What age group is the game? Are you getting any NARs?
 
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The show of confidence from your ref sec is good. I highly recommend to find someone to mentor you in this game.

What age group is the game? Are you getting any NARs?
Ahh no I'm not in the middle I'm the senior assistant but the chance to watch the ref should be invaluable as he must be of decent standard to get a semi final middle
 
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Maybe I should look into asking for a mentor
Nothing wrong with me mate I try to ref to the best of my ability every time I cross the white line
I would encourage you to accept that NONE of us are perfect. We all should be reflecting on our performance and look for ways to improve regardless of level, experience, etc. We have all had things happen where you look back and wonder "did I get that one right?" "wish I had called it a bit tighter" "Could I have approached that differently?" When we think we have nothing to learn and we can't possibly have made a mistake, then we are setting ourselves up for problems. I've been at it for 5 years and 500 games. Have been playing for 41 years additionally. I can tell you, I still have referees that I look up to and seek out advice/insight from and always will. One of my early mentors recommended doing a written self critique after every game. What did I do well? What could I do better? I don't do it in written format but still self-evaluate after every game. I ask higher level referees when I work with them (if I'm center) if they have any insights where I can improve.

One of my old bosses at work summed it up pretty well. "we don't know, what we don't know" Get a mentor to help see any blind spots. If you are spot on then it helps to have some validation also.

I look forward to every assessment and also having a mentor observe/work with me. Great way to learn and improve.
 
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I would encourage you to accept that NONE of us are perfect. We all should be reflecting on our performance and look for ways to improve regardless of level, experience, etc. We have all had things happen where you look back and wonder "did I get that one right?" "wish I had called it a bit tighter" "Could I have approached that differently?" When we think we have nothing to learn and we can't possibly have made a mistake, then we are setting ourselves up for problems. I've been at it for 5 years and 500 games. Have been playing for 41 years additionally. I can tell you, I still have referees that I look up to and seek out advice/insight from and always will. One of my early mentors recommended doing a written self critique after every game. What did I do well? What could I do better? I don't do it in written format but still self-evaluate after every game. I ask higher level referees when I work with them (if I'm center) if they have any insights where I can improve.

One of my old bosses at work summed it up pretty well. "we don't know, what we don't know" Get a mentor to help see any blind spots. If you are spot on then it helps to have some validation also.

I look forward to every assessment and also having a mentor observe/work with me. Great way to learn and improve.
Oh no I don't mean it like I've done no mistakes I know I do mistakes but what I mean is that I try my hardest every time u red yes I make mistakes but you don't learn if you don't make them
 
the advice to join your local RA is good and they will support you. Your county FA should get you a mentor but it is difficult as most mentors are reffing and observers are busy observing promotion canditates. Working o in a team of three will be a great learning experience and maybe try and watch some other refs who do that league. I do 75% youth to 25% OA and in my three seasons I have done a lot of games. I had my first abandonment this year, average a yellow a game, my red card count is low due to what I ref but I still caution at youth and have sent off players. I understand you are limited by lack of transport but these leagues sound like the wild west. Try and get some support as I feel your bad luck as you keep getting nightmare games might put you in harm. Please speak to your RDO or your RA society, there will be refs out there who will come along and support you. You pay your dues to the County FA so there should be no excuse for them not to support a young ref.
 
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