The Ref Stop

First few open age games

Owswald

New Member
Level 7 Referee
I’m a 16-year-old ref based in the north of England, I’ve been a referee for just under three years and I recently reffed my first open age game.

I think it mostly went well, only two cautions and not a close game. My biggest concern afterwards was the level of dissent I was tolerating - having only ever done junior games before, the level of dissent seemed unbelievably high - mostly in terms of how constant it was. Is it right to accept a higher level of dissent at this level, because it seemed to be fairly standard? Although of course I don’t know really what’s standard, having only done one game.

Also, do you have any advice on how I can talk to these players (who are all older than me) in a way that doesn’t patronise them?

I have another match a week on Saturday, followed by a League Cup semi-final two weeks after that, for which I’ll have neutral assistants. They’re both much more experienced than me (one’s the league chairman/RA secretary and the other’s the league secretary). I’ll definitely use them as a source of advice but I wondered if you have any tips for making the most out of NARs.

Thanks in advance.
 
The Ref Stop
I’m a 16-year-old ref based in the north of England, I’ve been a referee for just under three years and I recently reffed my first open age game.

I think it mostly went well, only two cautions and not a close game. My biggest concern afterwards was the level of dissent I was tolerating - having only ever done junior games before, the level of dissent seemed unbelievably high - mostly in terms of how constant it was. Is it right to accept a higher level of dissent at this level, because it seemed to be fairly standard? Although of course I don’t know really what’s standard, having only done one game.

Also, do you have any advice on how I can talk to these players (who are all older than me) in a way that doesn’t patronise them?

I have another match a week on Saturday, followed by a League Cup semi-final two weeks after that, for which I’ll have neutral assistants. They’re both much more experienced than me (one’s the league chairman/RA secretary and the other’s the league secretary). I’ll definitely use them as a source of advice but I wondered if you have any tips for making the most out of NARs.

Thanks in advance.
I was in a similar boat to you not so long ago. I’m 18 now and have my first step 6 middle in a couple of weeks.

One thing I do is at the coin toss, ask the captains their name and note it down on my hand. I ask them if I can call them by their names and I also say ‘my name is Dylan. Feel free to call me Dylan, Dyls or anything along those lines. You can also call me ref if you like - I don’t mind’.
Straight away, I feel like I have built some rapport with two of the most important people on each team and two people who can really help me. Most of the captains tend to call me Dylan and I always refer to them throughout as their name.

I have also found that trying to find a common ground with all players works well. For example, if you have just given a foul and a player doesn’t agree, just speak to them quietly and say something like ‘you may not agree with me, but I saw you trip him, I can only go with what I see, buddy.’

I find speaking to them honestly and fairly gets players on your side with you. I think they get frustrated if you don’t talk to them.

You may receive better advice from far more senior referees than me, so, I suggest you take theirs !
 
In a very similar position to Dylan myself. Been at Open Age for a year and a half nearly, having come up as a Level 7, who’d only done youth football as a Level Y before that point.

The levels of dissent are inordinately higher - that’s indisputable. I personally think we have to fight a little more for respect when we’re younger, as more than enough times I’ve heard a comment about my age the moment I rock up at a pitch.

It’s actually the reason I totally think the U18 armband scheme doesn’t work, is completely unfit for purpose and I actually didn’t wear it after my first 10 Open Age games, and I found interesting results in that regard 🤷‍♂️

Back to the point, dissent is higher, and your threshold will need to rise if you want to avoid abandoning games after binning 5 players from one team, within a span of 10mins.

Dylan’s comments about capitains and communicating with people are spot on. When I first moved to Open Age I found I could be quite harsh, I’d almost see everyone who tried to talk to me as an attack, whereas I’ve learnt some people really just want a chat, and sone people will always want to get the last word in, and occasionally the best thing to do is walk away in that situation.

Try and build rapport with players. Sometimes they’ll engage in conversation in passing, and I’ve always found it helpful to entertain this.

More experienced folk might totally disagree with me - but as someone whose made a year or so ago, as a 16 year old in Open Age, stick with it, because you’ll learn your trade
 
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