Hi Charlie, im new'ish, ive been reffing 9 months now, but I already feel like ive learn 100x a course or book could have taught me.
Its been clearly established by the signatures of the other refs on the forum that I am perhaps the most lenient ref in England.
Now im refereeing predominately adult football circa 2nd/3rd division stuff, my best advice is "Early Cards". Not every game of course, but you will have a lot of *Those Teams* that will just be like that, big dirty challenge - got away with it - well im going to go harder and stronger next time!
Players that ignore warnings, you try and be nice and just tell them to calm it down or whatever and they give you a mouthful. You've literally not booked them - and essentially done a favour by not cautioning them and given them a friendly word in their ear - and they'll to you like you've just slapped their nan in the face.
"Early Cards".
Lay down the law early doors to biggest mouth or the dirtiest fouler. It will control the game because the next time you have to talk to them... You're talking to them with the possibility of showing them a second yellow and an early shower. Their attitude will change.
If it doesnt, really DONT BE AFRAID to bang the red, theres no time frame for cards. I gave a caution 2 minutes in on my game on Saturday for a player clapping my decision to give a DFK on the edge of the area. You could tell he was mouthy and smarmy - but didnt get another word out of him the rest of the game.
As soon as you see the careless challenges go in, regardless if you've let a stronger challenge slide earlier... they're only going to get worse, so bang a caution to the next wreckless/late challenge and let them know you're not afraid to card players.