The Ref Stop

Open Age Was I a bit harsh?

HarryD

Well-Known Member
OA game today - Red vs Blue. Not much happened apart from the 9 goals apart from a couple of incidents. First was a caution. Player was caught offside, kicked the ball away and told the CAR to 'f**k off'. Anyone else have this a lot? As in THREE GAMES IN A ROW a lot? Then in the 89th minute, same player was caught offside and said to a player ''f**k off you f**king fat c**t'. Cue second yellow and red. Cue pandemonium. 21 other players all decide to surround me saying how that was the worst decision they've ever seen and how I ruined the game. After the full time whistle, I had a few players surround me demanding an explanation - I told them he could have been shown a straight red for OFFINABUS but they wouldn't have it. Told them to walk away before they get themselves into trouble. They walked off (thankfully). Anyone got any suggestions for any similar future incidents? Because I honesty haven't got a clue. Part of me thinks 'might have been harsh' but another part of me thinks 'HARRY YOU MUPPET, WHERE WAS THE STRAIGHT RED?!?!?!...admittedly I am going mad.
 
The Ref Stop
Just add 'players saying that you ruined the game by sending someone off in the 89th minute' to the pet hates thread. You'll feel better for it.

I had one player saying that when I sent his skipper off in the 27th minute today, but after 89 minutes, sheesh!
 
I wouldn't have minded if it was close and resulted in a goal being scored afterwards, but it was 7-2! Sunday league is full of geniuses.
 
Harsh? No way, that's more on the lenient side of the spectrum I think!
 
OA game today - Red vs Blue. Not much happened apart from the 9 goals apart from a couple of incidents. First was a caution. Player was caught offside, kicked the ball away and told the CAR to 'f**k off'. Anyone else have this a lot? As in THREE GAMES IN A ROW a lot? Then in the 89th minute, same player was caught offside and said to a player ''f**k off you f**king fat c**t'. Cue second yellow and red. Cue pandemonium. 21 other players all decide to surround me saying how that was the worst decision they've ever seen and how I ruined the game. After the full time whistle, I had a few players surround me demanding an explanation - I told them he could have been shown a straight red for OFFINABUS but they wouldn't have it. Told them to walk away before they get themselves into trouble. They walked off (thankfully). Anyone got any suggestions for any similar future incidents? Because I honesty haven't got a clue. Part of me thinks 'might have been harsh' but another part of me thinks 'HARRY YOU MUPPET, WHERE WAS THE STRAIGHT RED?!?!?!...admittedly I am going mad.

Spot on for the first caution.

Should've been straight red for the 2nd incident.....what offence did you caution him for?

Really only 2 courses of action with the 2nd one....call them over, remind them they're on a caution already and to stop being a pain....or the straight red.
Personally, unless it was either screamed across the pitch at top volume or provoked a strong reaction from the other player, I'd probably be going with the warning....
 
My old man came to watch today - he heard from the other side of the pitch. I reckon it should have been straight red, I have no idea what possessed me to give the yellow instead. I put it under C2 - before he said that, he said 'NO F**KING WAY REF THATS NEVER OFFSIDE'. That's admittedly very soft but its the only way to explain it to the county FA without looking a tit. I did mention what he said after that though.
 
You weren't harsh at all, far from it. Like many others, I'd probably have gone with a straight red for OFFINABUS.

Ignore the players, sounds like they were totally wrong on this occasion.
 
Yeah, I suppose it's a case of letting them drag me down. Luckily I have a nice easy weekend next week - neither of the teams on saturday have had a player booked for two years. Sunday I've got closed. Not complaining!:P
 
The only way I could have explained it was the 'no f**king way ref' which, as I've previously mentioned is the softest booking ever. In the heat of the moment, I just got the yellow out first. Lost my composure. Its only in hindsight I realised it was absolutely ridiculous and the one thing I could have done which wasn't an option under the circumstances. Oops.
 
The positive is that you have recognised that there might have been a better way yo deal with it.
This will leave better equipped for the next time it occurs.
 
Yeah, don't dwell on it - but learn and move on, it's the only way.

It sounds like you fall into a similar trap as I sometimes do, which is thinking that if they're complaining they must have a point, however vague. Often they don't - they're probably trying to psych you out, to make it less likely you'll want to challenge them. Or they're making you the bad guy because they've underperformed (always easier to blame the ref). As you do more and more games (and, if you're lucky, see more experienced refs in action with different teams) you'll get more confident that you literally hold all the cards and the game is in your control, not the players. Good luck!
 
You cautioned him the first time he did it and, presumably, you warned him about his language. What else did he expect?
 
U10? Stuff that haha! Too much for me ;) Hopefully they wont be a problem but sods law dictates that now I've said that there'll be 17 yellows and 3 reds :P
 
As has been mentioned, you will learn from games and incidents like this. Please remember that abusive language should be punished by the player being shown a straight red card. Though I would ask whether abusive language had been used previously during the game. I would suggest you set your stall out, and make it clear to both captains that abuse will not be tolerated, and then follow this up with action if necessary.

Regarding players surrounding you. I would have reported the club(s) to your County FA, and let them deal with it. I would also copy the league in on the report as well. Then hopefully the clubs will be reminded that it is their responsibility to control their players.
 
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