Generally speaking, I would advise not to respond to players in that way, whatever they have said. Don't go down to their level (in this instance), and keep professional. In this example, it actually caused dissent in the way you responded. Just to keep integrity and professionalism I wouldn't say things like 'Shut up', or comment on/insult the players in anyway.
I would say put this down to experience. No harm done, and just learn from it to aid your game in a beneficial way. I understand why you've said it, and don't blame you at all, but I would just try to stay professional in the eyes of the players, coaches/managers and spectators.
To his comments today re mutual respect, I would've replied 'Yes, I agree there is a need for mutual respect, but you haven't shown me any with what you have just called me, so you can't expect it back' or something along those lines. Something that points out there can be no mutual respect if he calls you that.