Opinion

Hi all , had a few comments today that I had previous and wanted some advice how you would deal with it . Firstly a coach shouting at me from the sidelines regards a foul I didn’t give which I thought wasn’t , when approaching him he says I’m entitled to my opinion ! . A player from the home team later questions my decision which I tell him I have given the decision and won’t change my mind so just get on with the game , the coach then shouts over he’s entitled to his opinion .
I get players sometimes want to know why I gave the decision which I will explain but how much can they get away with the entitled opinion excuse ?

Chrisp72 said:

get players sometimes want to know why I gave the decision which I will explain but how much can they get away with the entitled opinion e

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Honestly they cannot get away with it at all. I always say they’re entitled to ask for clarification but after that they aren’t changing my decision and it’s going to start being dissent.

It’s like those players who just have something to say on every call you make “how many ref? That one not a foul? Any for us today?” Etc etc. none of them alone quite meet the threshold but the joy I feel when they ignore my warnings and get to send them to sit out and let me ref without them buzzing around my head is euphoric.

Perfectly entitled to have and keep his own opinion, and I’m perfectly entitled to caution him for sharing it so publically in a dissentful manner which undermines my authority and questions my ability or neutrality.

Bosh

(keep the ‘bosh’ in your own head too)

Comes down to thresholds. It is important to keep control of the game. One or two people constantly having a pop, will quickly turn into more as the game carries on.

I usually acknowledging them and concisely explain why I did what I did, if the game tempo allows it and they are close enough for the explanation.

Then start a stepped approach. Before a restart, invite them over (or you approach the benches if they are in the dugout) to firmly tell them where you are with them publicly and persistently criticising your decisions. Cite that they are part of the dissent criteria (Public, Persistent and Personal). Then if it carries on, bin/caution them and it will be no surprise to anyone.

Try to tune most of this nonsense out whilst reserving the right to intervene if you think it is a risk to your authority. Free character assessments (from everyone) tend to be a constant part of refereeing and over reacting to very minor incidents can also pose a risk to your authority. If you wish to call out disssent (or you think it is necessary to explain your decision) don’t get stuck in a protracted conversation. Just a few words (‘I didn’t see it that way’ or ‘no, he got the ball and your player fell over his leg’), and then on your way to the next position on the field. At least part of this approach is about communicating to all players and coaches that you are in control of the game and don’t intend to participate in a ‘contest of ideas’. Having said that, dissent is never OK and you should always feel entitled to call it out early as described above.

One good advice I was given early on was that if you get into any discussion of this sort (same context) with players or coaches, you have to come out of it on top. Otherwise everyone will get the impression that you lack of authority and we know where that ends up.

There are a number of ways you can come away on top without using cards or making the other side lose face. It's a skill and art you gain with experience. You have to firm and hold your stance. But you have to use your cards if they don't get the message.