Thanks for all your comments - really appreciate it! I've definitely not described that last tackle very well. It was one of those where he leaves the ground momentarily, lands and slides, but in a manner that there is no way he was going to make contact with anything whilst he was in the air, because he's not close enough to the opponent, If that makes sense?! First one was similar. Again, he's got his studs up and he's jumped in but in a way that he could pull out if he realises he's going to take the opponent's leg out. The tackle that I cautioned for, but felt I should have dismissed for was different. Both feet off the ground and no control. He's going to take out anything in his path - fortunately he didn't make contact. I know I got this one wrong, definitely was a red. I think part of the reason I bottled it was because none of the aggrieved team's player seemed bothered by it. The guy who nearly got taken out just walked away - no reaction whatsoever from anyone. That made me doubt what I'd seen. I had the impression that I was the only person there that saw it as a red card challenge. Of course, it's a red card whether or not everyone else thinks so, but even so - when you're doubting yourself it makes making a match changing decision like that almost impossible to make. Like when we see a challenge in the penalty area but we're not sure if it was fair or not. You don't give it unless you're sure. The way around that I guess is for me to not doubt myself in those situations, and trust what I've seen, rather than doubting myself and making the wrong decision.
Dave - I live 2 mins away from where that fixture was - I'd have come down if I'd known you were reffing it!
As for the simulation, i don't think it's ever possible to be 100% sure. You'd have to know his intentions to be 100%. Saying that, it was simulation. Not only was the contact initiated by the striker (defender didn't move after the strikers last touch, literally stood his ground), but the contact that was made was never enough to put him on the ground. He went down quite theatrically as well, arms waving around, several rolls once he'd hit the floor. What annoys me most about that incident isn't that I think I got it wrong, it's that I never gave myself the opportunity to make the correct decision. Like I said, my thought process was 'was he fouled? No. No penalty', whereas it should have been 'was he fouled? No. Did he simulate contact?'. That's something I'm going to have to work into my decision making process for challenges in the box - penalty, no penalty or simulation, rather than penalty or not. The charging suggestion is definitely valid as well.
Markt - I really like the idea of questioning why you shouldn't make a particular decision. That's the sort of process I could've really done with for that game. On both occasions it would've been 'because no one is complaining, and the captain's making excuses'. Bang, red card.
I'm not beating myself up over this, or dwelling on my mistakes. It's only by making mistakes, analysing why I've made a mistake, and taking steps to avoid the same mistakes that I improve. I did it a few months ago - didn't caution a player for persistant offenses because I had 30 seconds of added time left to play, despite him being on a last warning. After the game, I made it very clear to myself that a caution is a caution, whether in the first minute or the last minute. Had exactly the same thing happen the following week but this time I made the caution. Very pleased that I learnt from the first time.
As for the manager at the end, I totally agree that I didn't need to listen to it. I always feel like managers have a right to ask about decisions that I've made, and they've got a right to disagree with them (as long as they do so in a polite and respectful manner). I like to explain things to them after the game, in the hope that I'll be able to educate them a little bit, and improve their own understanding of the laws (I.e. Just because you take the ball first doesn't mean it was a fair tackle!) I guess sometimes they just don't want to know - they're more interested in venting their frustrations rather than actually discussing the game. I didn't report the manager for misconduct as I didn't feel he crossed the line. He was calm, he didn't insult me - I chose to stand there and listen to him, don't feel it would be fair to report him for that. As for asking me not to report my cards (I did report them in full), if I was to report every manager who asked me not to send my cautions in, I'd be writing a misconduct report every week.
Padfoot - I agree. In this case, I was weak. I allowed myself and my decisions to be influenced by the sweet talking captain, and made several potentially match changing decisions wrong.
Capnbloodbeard - I don't know how I allowed myself to be influenced by the captain. In fairness, he's only the second captain that I've had that's actually stepped in and tried to talk me out carding a player. It's low level grass roots football I'm doing so the captain is usually just 'the best player' haha. Saying that, I think this is the first time I've allowed myself to be talked out of giving a card, or making a decision. As for handball, I don't feel it was deliberate. His hand moving up was a reaction - not an action that he'd made consciously. At least that's the way I saw it. The defender was very close to the ball, and he's turned away to avoid being hit with the ball. His arm hasn't really gone up to prevent the ball hitting his face, it's more a natural result of turning his body quickly. That why I didn't feel I could penalise him for it.
Dave - thank you for that it's nice to hear when all you get week in week week out is complaints and moaning about everything you do haha. I'd never done the home team before so I wasn't really sure what to expect. I know now hahaha.
Dave - I live 2 mins away from where that fixture was - I'd have come down if I'd known you were reffing it!
As for the simulation, i don't think it's ever possible to be 100% sure. You'd have to know his intentions to be 100%. Saying that, it was simulation. Not only was the contact initiated by the striker (defender didn't move after the strikers last touch, literally stood his ground), but the contact that was made was never enough to put him on the ground. He went down quite theatrically as well, arms waving around, several rolls once he'd hit the floor. What annoys me most about that incident isn't that I think I got it wrong, it's that I never gave myself the opportunity to make the correct decision. Like I said, my thought process was 'was he fouled? No. No penalty', whereas it should have been 'was he fouled? No. Did he simulate contact?'. That's something I'm going to have to work into my decision making process for challenges in the box - penalty, no penalty or simulation, rather than penalty or not. The charging suggestion is definitely valid as well.
Markt - I really like the idea of questioning why you shouldn't make a particular decision. That's the sort of process I could've really done with for that game. On both occasions it would've been 'because no one is complaining, and the captain's making excuses'. Bang, red card.
I'm not beating myself up over this, or dwelling on my mistakes. It's only by making mistakes, analysing why I've made a mistake, and taking steps to avoid the same mistakes that I improve. I did it a few months ago - didn't caution a player for persistant offenses because I had 30 seconds of added time left to play, despite him being on a last warning. After the game, I made it very clear to myself that a caution is a caution, whether in the first minute or the last minute. Had exactly the same thing happen the following week but this time I made the caution. Very pleased that I learnt from the first time.
As for the manager at the end, I totally agree that I didn't need to listen to it. I always feel like managers have a right to ask about decisions that I've made, and they've got a right to disagree with them (as long as they do so in a polite and respectful manner). I like to explain things to them after the game, in the hope that I'll be able to educate them a little bit, and improve their own understanding of the laws (I.e. Just because you take the ball first doesn't mean it was a fair tackle!) I guess sometimes they just don't want to know - they're more interested in venting their frustrations rather than actually discussing the game. I didn't report the manager for misconduct as I didn't feel he crossed the line. He was calm, he didn't insult me - I chose to stand there and listen to him, don't feel it would be fair to report him for that. As for asking me not to report my cards (I did report them in full), if I was to report every manager who asked me not to send my cautions in, I'd be writing a misconduct report every week.
Padfoot - I agree. In this case, I was weak. I allowed myself and my decisions to be influenced by the sweet talking captain, and made several potentially match changing decisions wrong.
Capnbloodbeard - I don't know how I allowed myself to be influenced by the captain. In fairness, he's only the second captain that I've had that's actually stepped in and tried to talk me out carding a player. It's low level grass roots football I'm doing so the captain is usually just 'the best player' haha. Saying that, I think this is the first time I've allowed myself to be talked out of giving a card, or making a decision. As for handball, I don't feel it was deliberate. His hand moving up was a reaction - not an action that he'd made consciously. At least that's the way I saw it. The defender was very close to the ball, and he's turned away to avoid being hit with the ball. His arm hasn't really gone up to prevent the ball hitting his face, it's more a natural result of turning his body quickly. That why I didn't feel I could penalise him for it.
Dave - thank you for that it's nice to hear when all you get week in week week out is complaints and moaning about everything you do haha. I'd never done the home team before so I wasn't really sure what to expect. I know now hahaha.