RefSix

Using the forum as a tool to progress

QuaverRef

I used to be indecisive but now i'm not so sure
#1
This isn't entirely referee related, but more so my experience of this forum in an 'open blog' style way. I've decided to leave the forum (nobody will mind, I didn't highly contribute) but with my personal experiences of this forum, I've felt it's lost it's way. I joined 3 years ago as a new referee and found it to be highly beneficial to learn tricks of the trade, and gain opinions and guidance on situations I had problems with on the pitch. Unfortunately, I feel this has slowly progressed into a place where you have to watch what you say before you get jumped on, be told how it used to be OK and patronised for getting something wrong. Everything becomes a blame, whether that's a referee telling us about an error they made, law changes, VAR etc and rather than discussing the scenario at hand and saying how things can be changed for the better, somebody has to be told they are wrong. The majority of referees here are genuinely trying to help and credit to them, but it takes too long to filter through particular messages to gain the advice, if by that stage it hasn't already gone off track.

I noticed another thread which had somebody state similar problems, and I hope this forum doesn't continue to progress down this route as at one stage, it was a genuine benefit for me. I unfortunately no longer feel this benefit and just feel frustrated.
 

Kes

I'll Decide ...
#2
The forum membership has practically doubled in the time elapsed since I joined, which was a year or so before you did. As a result, there's more of a mix of individuals and therefore more of a mix of opinion and online "personality". I get what you mean about the "one-upmanship" and condemnation side of things - but you'll get that with any forum mate. It is only an internet forum though and the moderators on here do a good (if in my own opinion, rather overly-guarded) job of keeping things respectable and polite.

You need to be able to cherry-pick the advice and information you feel is relevant and helpful and ignore everything else if you genuinely view this site as a "progression tool". It is, at the end of the day, only a discussion platform.

I tend to post my own experiences on occasion for the benefit of generating conversation or even for humour/amusement purposes. If I want to actually learn anything, I'll just search and/or read. ;) :) :cool:
 

RobOda

RefChat Addict
#3
I do hope you reconsider and keep participating here, but I understand where you're coming from, there are plenty of serious topics that keep getting derailed, (usually by the same people).

Best wishes with your refereeing in the future. :)
 

Sheffields Finest

Maybe I'm foolish, maybe I'm blind!
#4
Don’t go QR, although we usually disagree on most stuff I respect your opinion tremendously and it’s good to have healthy banter and debate. If we all agreed it would be a pretty boring space really. And anyway, I was in Boro last night and Wilton today and couldn’t see ye running around them parks getting fit for the season ahead.Who’s going to keep us informed on all things Boro too.

I don’t usually get involved with the nerdy stuff or the oneupmanship that some members do, chill out, keep posting, we’ve got years of arguments and debate to have yet! 😎👊UTB (Boro)
 
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#5
@QuaverRef Id also hope you reconsider. Pick and choose who you read. The forum has an ignore feature that allows you to completely block posters that consistently bother you. Like most internet fora (and indeed most of life) there is good and bad—contribute instead of stepping away!
 

RustyRef

Administrator
Staff member
#6
As moderators we have been working hard to try and deal with members that cause problems and will continue to do so. I certainly share your concerns that some people try to belittle others and gain one-upmanship, but we will try to stop this. You will have probably noticed that a couple of members that used to do this most days are no longer active, so hopefully that shows we will deal with things.

This should be a learning forum, and if people post things that you think belittle you then please hit the report button and we will deal with it. There will always of course be differences of opinions, but we should be able to disagree with each other without insulting or belittling each other.
 

one

RefChat Addict
#9
I can see the issues you refer to. Al I can suggest is use those as yet another learning tool to learn how to deal with similar issues out there in the real world. This forum is not too different to what you get out there. Agreements, disagreements, healthy debates, passionate debates, a bit of banter and sometimes crossing the line. All can be learnt from.

Not easy for a new referee or a new member to take all on board. But if you have been here for a little while then learning how to deal with it is another tool you can add into your tool bag which you can re-use when you are in the real refereeing world.
 
#10
I stopped using this forum a few years back for the same reason, now I just look occasionally. There was one bloke, I can't remember his name, who deliberately antagonised people. It was obvious, but nothing was done about him, he had probably never refereed a game of football in his life.
The thing about forums like this is to take the useful bits and ignore the rubbish, for example the sin bin thread was excellent and cleared up some confusion i had.
 

Big Cat

RefChat Addict
#11
I can see the issues you refer to. Al I can suggest is use those as yet another learning tool to learn how to deal with similar issues out there in the real world. This forum is not too different to what you get out there. Agreements, disagreements, healthy debates, passionate debates, a bit of banter and sometimes crossing the line. All can be learnt from.

Not easy for a new referee or a new member to take all on board. But if you have been here for a little while then learning how to deal with it is another tool you can add into your tool bag which you can re-use when you are in the real refereeing world.
I don't really get what this post is all about tbh
The interesting members (like your good self) are those who have something different about them; knowledge, experience, sense of humour or character. The latter include those test the perimeter fence on occasion. The forum makes us better referees, so members shouldn't bleat about it
 

one

RefChat Addict
#12
I don't really get what this post is all about tbh
The interesting members (like your good self) are those who have something different about them; knowledge, experience, sense of humour or character. The latter include those test the perimeter fence on occasion. The forum makes us better referees, so members shouldn't bleat about it
Haha. I'm flattered :)
All I'm saying is "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". If you don't like that, how about "no pain no gain"?
 

one

RefChat Addict
#13
Tbh although I don't want or like anyone crossing the line, I wouldn't want this forum to be all lovey dovey either. It gets too boring. You'd want a bit of spice but as I said within limit. Banter without being offensive.
The problem is the fine line is in a different place for different people.
 

Brian Hamilton

I am the storm
Observer/Tutor
#15
This forum, along with other experiences in refereeing have made me caustic and cynical. Part of the reason for this is because of those increasingly frequent occasions where I post something in good faith, almost always from a good source or based on training I've received, only to have it ripped apart or criticised. An example would be my posting of IFAB's further advice on the taking of goal kicks since the law was changed.

It changed me from being one of the most prolific posters on this forum to hardly posting at all. And now when I do, it's usually for my own amusement. That's not being precious, precocious or prim, I just don't need to have my comments, which based on my experience, have a high degree of validity attached to them, ripped to pieces.

And despite the best efforts of the moderators, there's always a new kid in town wanting to have a go. So @QuaverRef if I've contributed to your decision, I am sorry. If I haven't, then all's good.

I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like… tears in rain. Time to die.
 

Sheffields Finest

Maybe I'm foolish, maybe I'm blind!
#17
This forum, along with other experiences in refereeing have made me caustic and cynical. Part of the reason for this is because of those increasingly frequent occasions where I post something in good faith, almost always from a good source or based on training I've received, only to have it ripped apart or criticised. An example would be my posting of IFAB's further advice on the taking of goal kicks since the law was changed.

It changed me from being one of the most prolific posters on this forum to hardly posting at all. And now when I do, it's usually for my own amusement. That's not being precious, precocious or prim, I just don't need to have my comments, which based on my experience, have a high degree of validity attached to them, ripped to pieces.

And despite the best efforts of the moderators, there's always a new kid in town wanting to have a go. So @QuaverRef if I've contributed to your decision, I am sorry. If I haven't, then all's good.

I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like… tears in rain. Time to die.
Not very sporting to fire on an unarmed opponent. I thought you were supposed to be good. Aren't you the "good" man? C'mon, Deckard. Show me what you're made of. :)
 
#19
This board has changed and i feel that sometimes the people running it are too much in favour of the establishment. Sad really.
I don't think that's the case. I do, however, think that often relatively straightforward topics descend into farce with some members trying to over complicate and/or over analyse things. I also don't think that it helps that as a society on social media and forums, there seems to be a general reluctance for people to see the other side of an argument and things can offer move into the realms of "i'm right, and if you don't agree you're an idiot"

As with any resource (and that's what I view this forum as), you need to dip in and pick out the bits that are relevant to you and try and ignore the bits that aren't or that annoy you.
 
#20
reluctance for people to see the other side of an argument
I think there are quite strong cognitive-biases to resist having one's opinion changed. We can't learn much from opinions we agree with. By the same token, we won't learn anything from those we're always opposed to (and there's only a couple who fit that bill)
 
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