Ref4Me

Season So Far

Joshref

Well-Known Member
Level 7 Referee
EDIT: Wrote so much it wouldn’t fit onto one thread so split up into two parts. Most exciting stuff happens in Part 2

This is my first full season as a Level 7 referee. Just for a bit of context, I’m 17 and have currently only stuck to youth football games. Most have been 9 a side, some have been 11 a side. The long term aim is trying to do more adult games and moving up the promotion ranks. Right now however I’m earning money for easy games, it’s working well in conjunction with my college studies and I’m getting experience from it and moving at my own pace. With it being youth games, the season hasn’t been as exciting as some other stories on here, but I feel like discussing my games just so I can review them better, hence why I’m writing this thread even if it isn’t full of exciting stories. If you have any feedback on my reffing or anything let me know. I’ll update this as the season goes on and I do more games, but I’ll just fill you in on my 13 middles so far. Currently 4 teams are using me regulary, and I’ve also reffed for another. I’ll go through my games so far

PRE SEASON FRIENDLIES
12th August: U12s. Didn’t really enjoy it but Im not sure why. My performance was fine and did nothing wrong. Away Team had a gobby manager who seemed bemused at the constant offsides. Home team played a good offside trap and led 4-0 at half time. However they were caught out a corner. Most corners before had seen the away team try play a short corner and be caught offside from playing it back as a one two. It was clearly a play from the home team, as the home team manager shouted offside constantly for it and was normally right. However at one corner a home team player stayed on the line, meaning the short corner return wasn’t offside. The home manager shouted offside and all the home players stopped, expecting their managers to be right. Then everyone noticed the kid on the line, the away team played it in and scored. Away won 6-4, great comeback but nothing too eventful

SEPTEMBER

6th September. 3 U12s games. First game I’ll get back to later. Most eventful I’ve had. I’ll mention that at the end. Third game was pretty easy. Very poor quality of football though. Offsides were pretty easy seeing as neither teams defensive line understood where to be. A penalty was the most controversial thing. The players disputed it but it was a clear penalty so not really controversial. Like a WWE move in the box

Second game, cracking game of football, easy to ref. Away manager (managing a team of 11 year old thugs, all of whom were also extremely good on the ball though) asked me in first half to ”let the game flow more” after I’d blown them up for a third consecutive foul (all clear fouls as well.) I informed him that if his team stopped making fouls I would be able to let it flow more. Second half and the away team stopped making those stupid fouls. Once they get blown up on it, they tend to stop. Will get to first game at bottom of post

13th September. Under 12s. 11-1 to away team. And the home team scored after 15 seconds as well. All went downhill from there. One way traffic, home team didn’t get another attack. Called for a few tough away offsides, away manager tried to protest but it was only half hearted due to the score. A few were tight and I think I may have got one wrong on reflection but not much of an issue due to score line.

MAIN SEASON (will mention if not league game)

20th September. 2 Under 12 games. First one was 10-3 away win. Again one sided. A lot of first half offsides to call but nothing too difficult. Almost made an offside horror call before noticing a player playing everyone else quite far on at start of second half. First few away goals were tight for offsides but all on. The amount of foul throws was annoying me, so in the final 15 minutes I didn’t even let the small ones go, just blew up for every single one. Both managers accepted that and were annoyed at the players rather than me.

Second U12 game was a 5-2 home win. Harsh on foul throws on first 15. Away manager got annoyed after 10 minutes of it but his assistant told him to shut up. Rest of game was a lot more soft on the foul throws, there was also a lot less (players learn this way.) Lost control a bit in second half and could’ve dealt with it better, blown up for a few more fouls early on but there was nothing cynical or bad with it. Second away goal, possibly offside, but it was with seconds left and no one appealed. After the match I spoke with the away manager explaining my reasoning for foul throws but he just apologised for his response and accepted it. Away assistant manager turned out to be a referee tutor for local county FA (looked him up and he is tbf) and gave me a lot of praise for positioning and decision making and the foul throws. However he told me I should’ve sin binned a player that kicked the ball away. The player didn’t do it in frustration at a decision, more at annoyance of himself and I warned him, but apparently I should’ve sin binned him anyway. The kids Dad was the home team manager, so I spoke to him about it after the match when he was paying me. He told me the ref tutor was a former employee of his though, who he sacked after numerous fraudulent actions with business money. Don’t know if that impacted much, but what a small world.

27th September. U11s. First time I’d reffed this lot. Had a great game until the final few minutes. It was a close game, finishing 4-4 with a home team first time strike with 7 seconds to go from the halfway line. Final few minutes saw a few home parents annoyed after foul throw 996 (slight over exaggeration but the throws were that bad I had no option but to let them go) and after I called a close offside. With a minute to go and at 4-3 the away manager asked to come on to the pitch to check a player that was down. I let him, and it turns out he was very slowly tying the players shoelace. Smiling at what I thought was an attempt to waste time, I informed him I was adding on any time he was on the pitch (not sure what to do in regards to injury time at U11s, but couldn’t let this happen.) The manager quickly got off the pitch after about 45 seconds. And with 7 seconds to go home team scored. Despite this, both managers very happy with my performance, so all good. Was only a friendly anyway
 
The Referee Store

Joshref

Well-Known Member
Level 7 Referee
PART 2: OCTOBER
4th October. U11. Cup game, same home team as last week. 6-2 away win. Two major talking points, both of which I think I got correct. First was a home penalty for away players handball. I didn’t see the handball but every player stopped and from the way the ball changed direction I could tell what had happened. Blew for a penalty, the kid (number 5) stuck his hands on his head in shock, and I heard an old voice shout “never a pen referee.” Away AR (not neutral, just one of the away parents) shouted “give it a rest Jerry, clearest penalty I’ve ever seen.” One of the away players walked up to me and admitted it was a clear pen too (love the honesty of 10 year olds) so I know I made right decision. The same AR was involved in a second talking point. Second half, same number 5 who gave away the penalty lost the balll and fully kicked the home number 6 when he thought my back was turned. Away AR shouts “ref that’s brutal gotta be a booking.” I had a word with him, thanking him for his input and “honesty” but reminded him just ins and outs. I did book the kid however, no way he could get away with that. After the match spoke to the AR and it turns out he’s the kids Dad. He was furious when he saw his kid kick the player and told me the kid was paying the £10 himself, got to learn he can’t do that. Jerry was the kids Grandad on the mother’s side as well, and apparently was normally gobby on touchline. Unbelievable really.

11th October. U16. Big test for me in my first 11 a side game, and reffing kids that potentially could be a year younger than me. Not a bad game but was too keen with the whistle, blowing for too many soft fouls I think, and losing the control almost by the end. A clear penalty helped me resume control towards the end in a 4-0 home win. Almost made a few horror calls though, but I think it was the nerves. Again, almost being important

18th October. U16. First I had the same team again, this time in a cup game. Despite the away team leading 2-0 up after 35 minutes, it was 2-1 by half time, and 5-2 to the home team before we’d even reached the 5 minute mark of the second half. Finished 7-2. Even when the game was close though, I reffed the best I had in a long time. Allowed a lot more but not too much, and reached a perfect balance. Made a horror offside call against away team in first half at 2-0 (no way was that gonna lead to a goal luckily) and immediately apologised to both away parents and managers. Went over to away managers at half time to apologise but they said they could see why I made the mistake and not to worry about it. Second half was even easier to ref with the game only going one way.

U11s game after and I felt so in control it was great. The home team weren’t giving any foul throws away, which shows how well they’ve come, and I let a few go for the opposition with a casual reminder. Home team did win 14-2 so it was easier to ref for obvious reasons but still it felt like progress. Got a text from home manager praising my performance post game so all good

25th October. U12s. Finished 3-2 away team win with a winning goal with 22 seconds of normal time to go. First half went well, away team constantly offside and was easy to call. Away team coach (not the manager, manager was a nice guy) took surprise at the fact his team was offside and was constantly questioning it but it was all clear. Second half, made the first tight offside call and away team coach couldn’t believe it. I wasn’t 100% sure about it myself after blowing, by the time the away player received the ball the home number 2 (exceptionally quick defender) looked like he was playing him miles on but I thought when the pass was played number 2 hadn’t quite got level with him and thus the away player was offside (it turns out it was the wrong call as well ffs, didn’t have the right positioning at all.) However the away coach took it too far, as he seemed to say under his breath “****ing hell” and “****ing joke.” I wasn’t 100% sure if he said that, and didn’t want to inflame the situation further, so I left it. However a minute later, the away keeper took a short goal kick and the away manager ****ily said “offside“ in a mocking manner and I knew I had him. Next time it went out of play, walked up to him, warned him if he continued to undermine my authority I’d be cautioning him. I asked if that was alright and he gave a ****y yes to respond. Can’t have left him too ****y though, didn’t hear him for the rest of the match. Home manager thanked me for having a word with him after the match, telling me the away coach was unanimously disliked by most other managers in the league, which explains a lot.

Finally, back to the pre season game I mentioned earlier. The first game from 6th September. First half went great, 1-1, nothing too much. In the final moments of the first half, home team had a corner. Away team headed it clear but the clearance looked unnatural. It looked to me like it had come off his elbow, and I was leaning towards handball. However not a single home player, manager or parent called for it, so I decided to let it go. Half time, home manager said “Have I missed something because I thought it came off his arm” to which I explained why I hadn’t given it. I wasn’t 100% sure, and no one had appealed for it, so I didn't feel I could blow for it. Home manager accepted that, and was annoyed his players hadn’t appealed for it. Minutes into the second half, the away AR (not neutral, just a parent) tried to wave his flag to inform me that away team should have a penalty for handball. It bounced off the players thigh pretty clearly, and I was shocked he even tried to claim it (especially as he had stayed quiet for the possible away handball earlier.) I should have informed him then he was only doing the ins and outs (I’d asked the away manager to mention it but clearly he hasn’t) but play continued and I ran after the ball. I could hear the other parents mocking him that he’d been ignored and made a mental note to tell him next time play went out what his job was. I didn’t and boy did I regret it. 10 minutes to go, ball over top to away forward catches me out, I’m sprinting to catch up. Two away team players are now clean on goal, defender far behind. Away team forwards (no.9 and no.3) are running through. Number 9 has got the ball, dribbles all the way to the edge of the box when Number 3 smashes it in. I believed when Number 9 took the touch, Number 3 was offside. They say you can tell by a reaction when a decision is wrong. And when I disallowed that goal, I knew that. Away manager furious, and the AR comes storming onto the pitch and shouts “What’s the ****ing point of me having this flag then ref. I called for a handball earlier and you ignored that, and you’ve just given that decision offside when it was clearly on” extremely aggressively. I stop the clock and explain to the away team manager, whilst I was extremely shaken up, he needs to get rid of the parent AR right now. Away team manager seemed reluctant to deal with this psychopath but home team manager threatened to abandon the game if he didn’t. After much pressure, away team manager removed him. I then spoke to the away team manager and explained why I’d made the decision I made. He accepted what he saw, and as annoyed as he was believing he was on, he accepted it. Game played on with 10 minutes to go, home team score winning goal with minutes to go (last thing I wanted.) I blow the full time whistle, and ignoring the away parents shouts of its 2-2 boys. Spoke to someone after the game who I immensely trust, and he told me it was the wrong call by quite a bit. Dammit. Three Shelf parents walked over to acclaim my performance, saying while they disagreed with my mistake my handling of the situation and the rest of my game were brilliant. Away team manager gave me his number after the match, saying he needs a ref (turns out idiot parent AR is their usual ref but has received complaints before.) Not wanting to deal with parents like that, I never texted him back. I reported it all under misconduct to County FA over WGS, got a call from Head of Refereeing to check on me and promise me they were gonna try sanction him. The home club put a separate report in about him as it turns out he was swearing at the home teams kids, and threatening them by saying he knows where they live. I didn’t hear this, and none of the kids reported it until after the match, but the fact he’s refereeing games is scary. Still waiting for a sanction unfortunately

So yeahs that’s my season so far. Thanks to anyone who got through reading this long two part post, and sorry if some of it’s a bit boring but that’s it so far. Any feedback appreciated. Got an U16 and U12 game this weekend, the U16 being a team I’ve never reffed before so excited
 

Ben448844

RefChat Addict
Level 5 Referee
PART 2: OCTOBER
4th October. U11. Cup game, same home team as last week. 6-2 away win. Two major talking points, both of which I think I got correct. First was a home penalty for away players handball. I didn’t see the handball but every player stopped and from the way the ball changed direction I could tell what had happened. Blew for a penalty, the kid (number 5) stuck his hands on his head in shock, and I heard an old voice shout “never a pen referee.” Away AR (not neutral, just one of the away parents) shouted “give it a rest Jerry, clearest penalty I’ve ever seen.” One of the away players walked up to me and admitted it was a clear pen too (love the honesty of 10 year olds) so I know I made right decision. The same AR was involved in a second talking point. Second half, same number 5 who gave away the penalty lost the balll and fully kicked the home number 6 when he thought my back was turned. Away AR shouts “ref that’s brutal gotta be a booking.” I had a word with him, thanking him for his input and “honesty” but reminded him just ins and outs. I did book the kid however, no way he could get away with that. After the match spoke to the AR and it turns out he’s the kids Dad. He was furious when he saw his kid kick the player and told me the kid was paying the £10 himself, got to learn he can’t do that. Jerry was the kids Grandad on the mother’s side as well, and apparently was normally gobby on touchline. Unbelievable really.

11th October. U16. Big test for me in my first 11 a side game, and reffing kids that potentially could be a year younger than me. Not a bad game but was too keen with the whistle, blowing for too many soft fouls I think, and losing the control almost by the end. A clear penalty helped me resume control towards the end in a 4-0 home win. Almost made a few horror calls though, but I think it was the nerves. Again, almost being important

18th October. U16. First I had the same team again, this time in a cup game. Despite the away team leading 2-0 up after 35 minutes, it was 2-1 by half time, and 5-2 to the home team before we’d even reached the 5 minute mark of the second half. Finished 7-2. Even when the game was close though, I reffed the best I had in a long time. Allowed a lot more but not too much, and reached a perfect balance. Made a horror offside call against away team in first half at 2-0 (no way was that gonna lead to a goal luckily) and immediately apologised to both away parents and managers. Went over to away managers at half time to apologise but they said they could see why I made the mistake and not to worry about it. Second half was even easier to ref with the game only going one way.

U11s game after and I felt so in control it was great. The home team weren’t giving any foul throws away, which shows how well they’ve come, and I let a few go for the opposition with a casual reminder. Home team did win 14-2 so it was easier to ref for obvious reasons but still it felt like progress. Got a text from home manager praising my performance post game so all good

25th October. U12s. Finished 3-2 away team win with a winning goal with 22 seconds of normal time to go. First half went well, away team constantly offside and was easy to call. Away team coach (not the manager, manager was a nice guy) took surprise at the fact his team was offside and was constantly questioning it but it was all clear. Second half, made the first tight offside call and away team coach couldn’t believe it. I wasn’t 100% sure about it myself after blowing, by the time the away player received the ball the home number 2 (exceptionally quick defender) looked like he was playing him miles on but I thought when the pass was played number 2 hadn’t quite got level with him and thus the away player was offside (it turns out it was the wrong call as well ffs, didn’t have the right positioning at all.) However the away coach took it too far, as he seemed to say under his breath “****ing hell” and “****ing joke.” I wasn’t 100% sure if he said that, and didn’t want to inflame the situation further, so I left it. However a minute later, the away keeper took a short goal kick and the away manager ****ily said “offside“ in a mocking manner and I knew I had him. Next time it went out of play, walked up to him, warned him if he continued to undermine my authority I’d be cautioning him. I asked if that was alright and he gave a ****y yes to respond. Can’t have left him too ****y though, didn’t hear him for the rest of the match. Home manager thanked me for having a word with him after the match, telling me the away coach was unanimously disliked by most other managers in the league, which explains a lot.

Finally, back to the pre season game I mentioned earlier. The first game from 6th September. First half went great, 1-1, nothing too much. In the final moments of the first half, home team had a corner. Away team headed it clear but the clearance looked unnatural. It looked to me like it had come off his elbow, and I was leaning towards handball. However not a single home player, manager or parent called for it, so I decided to let it go. Half time, home manager said “Have I missed something because I thought it came off his arm” to which I explained why I hadn’t given it. I wasn’t 100% sure, and no one had appealed for it, so I didn't feel I could blow for it. Home manager accepted that, and was annoyed his players hadn’t appealed for it. Minutes into the second half, the away AR (not neutral, just a parent) tried to wave his flag to inform me that away team should have a penalty for handball. It bounced off the players thigh pretty clearly, and I was shocked he even tried to claim it (especially as he had stayed quiet for the possible away handball earlier.) I should have informed him then he was only doing the ins and outs (I’d asked the away manager to mention it but clearly he hasn’t) but play continued and I ran after the ball. I could hear the other parents mocking him that he’d been ignored and made a mental note to tell him next time play went out what his job was. I didn’t and boy did I regret it. 10 minutes to go, ball over top to away forward catches me out, I’m sprinting to catch up. Two away team players are now clean on goal, defender far behind. Away team forwards (no.9 and no.3) are running through. Number 9 has got the ball, dribbles all the way to the edge of the box when Number 3 smashes it in. I believed when Number 9 took the touch, Number 3 was offside. They say you can tell by a reaction when a decision is wrong. And when I disallowed that goal, I knew that. Away manager furious, and the AR comes storming onto the pitch and shouts “What’s the ****ing point of me having this flag then ref. I called for a handball earlier and you ignored that, and you’ve just given that decision offside when it was clearly on” extremely aggressively. I stop the clock and explain to the away team manager, whilst I was extremely shaken up, he needs to get rid of the parent AR right now. Away team manager seemed reluctant to deal with this psychopath but home team manager threatened to abandon the game if he didn’t. After much pressure, away team manager removed him. I then spoke to the away team manager and explained why I’d made the decision I made. He accepted what he saw, and as annoyed as he was believing he was on, he accepted it. Game played on with 10 minutes to go, home team score winning goal with minutes to go (last thing I wanted.) I blow the full time whistle, and ignoring the away parents shouts of its 2-2 boys. Spoke to someone after the game who I immensely trust, and he told me it was the wrong call by quite a bit. Dammit. Three Shelf parents walked over to acclaim my performance, saying while they disagreed with my mistake my handling of the situation and the rest of my game were brilliant. Away team manager gave me his number after the match, saying he needs a ref (turns out idiot parent AR is their usual ref but has received complaints before.) Not wanting to deal with parents like that, I never texted him back. I reported it all under misconduct to County FA over WGS, got a call from Head of Refereeing to check on me and promise me they were gonna try sanction him. The home club put a separate report in about him as it turns out he was swearing at the home teams kids, and threatening them by saying he knows where they live. I didn’t hear this, and none of the kids reported it until after the match, but the fact he’s refereeing games is scary. Still waiting for a sanction unfortunately

So yeahs that’s my season so far. Thanks to anyone who got through reading this long two part post, and sorry if some of it’s a bit boring but that’s it so far. Any feedback appreciated. Got an U16 and U12 game this weekend, the U16 being a team I’ve never reffed before so excited
Sounds like you're doing great.
 
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Degnann

SFA Ref
Level 5 Referee
Don’t listen to @one ;)Read every bit. Sounds like you are doing well and receiving compliments constantly. Keep it up
 
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Reactions: one

one

RefChat Addict
Level 7 Referee
On second thought, the effort of writing that deserves a response.

It's good to see a new ref have good offside awareness. If you don't have neutral AR's my suggestion is to give the benefit of any doubt to the attacking team.

Try lowering your tolerance for 'foul throws' in younger age groups (especially lower divisions) and see if that helps everyone enjoy the game more. Call the obvious ones though.
Sound like you have confidence, good command of the games and good communication skills. Keep that up. Be wary of not over doing it. Keep it short and simple.

Absolutely loved the fact that you admitted to your obvious mistake and apologized for it when you knew it was a mistake. It buys you respect.

Good on you for reporting the abusive CAR parent. He would have done that before without being reported. You did next week's ref a favour.

Overall seeing you keep record of your games to reflect on is fantastic. Keep doing it and you improve much faster. From what I have read, you need more challenging games. Ask for more U15 and U16's. It's the challenging games you learn the most from. Ask to be observed and get some feed back. Also ask to be given AR appointments for adult higher grade games with experienced referees. A lot to learn from them.
 

Joshref

Well-Known Member
Level 7 Referee
Thanks to everyone for the feedback (and for reading through that entire thing). @one especially for the most constructive feedback. In response to it yes I’m hoping to do more U16 games to give me more challenges.
This season is more a settling in season whilst I deal with college and A Levels, and my own playing football. Next year I plan on moving into reffing open age and yeh I’ll certainly ask to be given AR appointments from next year, the more I can learn the better
As for the two things I’ve learned from the past 2 months, you mentioned it. More lenient with the foul throws, found a good balance to it I think now that works for both teams.
I will probably update this for November and see how things have changed so get looking forward to another big update. Although looking at the weather outside here up North, I doubt Novembers update will be too long
Thanks for reading and thanks for the feedback 👍
 
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Ben448844

RefChat Addict
Level 5 Referee
Thanks to everyone for the feedback (and for reading through that entire thing). @one especially for the most constructive feedback. In response to it yes I’m hoping to do more U16 games to give me more challenges.
This season is more a settling in season whilst I deal with college and A Levels, and my own playing football. Next year I plan on moving into reffing open age and yeh I’ll certainly ask to be given AR appointments from next year, the more I can learn the better
As for the two things I’ve learned from the past 2 months, you mentioned it. More lenient with the foul throws, found a good balance to it I think now that works for both teams.
I will probably update this for November and see how things have changed so get looking forward to another big update. Although looking at the weather outside here up North, I doubt Novembers update will be too long
Thanks for reading and thanks for the feedback 👍
Introduc yourself to clubs who have games on 4g pitches.....
 

Comedyjock

New Member
Level 4 Referee
Didn't notice if you said it but consider this. If you are giving a foul throw, particularly with younger age groups, make sure you take 10 seconds to explain the exact reason for doing so. Although you are not there to coach the players it may prevent it reoccurring and makes you more approachable as the ref. Lets the players know the ref is not there to penalise only.
 

Ben448844

RefChat Addict
Level 5 Referee
Didn't notice if you said it but consider this. If you are giving a foul throw, particularly with younger age groups, make sure you take 10 seconds to explain the exact reason for doing so. Although you are not there to coach the players it may prevent it reoccurring and makes you more approachable as the ref. Lets the players know the ref is not there to penalise only.
Agreed. Its a ballance between trying to help them take legitimate throw ins and not making every throw in a drama. Make a thing of letting the taker know he's done it spot on if they've struggled with throws and then they do it right.

Its infuriating to see a kids game dominated by foul throws, especially as kids games tend to have alot of throw ins in them. I remember doing a couple of friendlies for a PL academy one evening. I did the middle for the first one and let the young ref go in the middle for the 2nd one. He was making u13s take throws from the exact positions and blowing for foul throws which weren't perfect throws but they weren't foul throws either. Let them play!
 

Joshref

Well-Known Member
Level 7 Referee
Finally, back to the pre season game I mentioned earlier. The first game from 6th September. First half went great, 1-1, nothing too much. In the final moments of the first half, home team had a corner. Away team headed it clear but the clearance looked unnatural. It looked to me like it had come off his elbow, and I was leaning towards handball. However not a single home player, manager or parent called for it, so I decided to let it go. Half time, home manager said “Have I missed something because I thought it came off his arm” to which I explained why I hadn’t given it. I wasn’t 100% sure, and no one had appealed for it, so I didn't feel I could blow for it. Home manager accepted that, and was annoyed his players hadn’t appealed for it. Minutes into the second half, the away AR (not neutral, just a parent) tried to wave his flag to inform me that away team should have a penalty for handball. It bounced off the players thigh pretty clearly, and I was shocked he even tried to claim it (especially as he had stayed quiet for the possible away handball earlier.) I should have informed him then he was only doing the ins and outs (I’d asked the away manager to mention it but clearly he hasn’t) but play continued and I ran after the ball. I could hear the other parents mocking him that he’d been ignored and made a mental note to tell him next time play went out what his job was. I didn’t and boy did I regret it. 10 minutes to go, ball over top to away forward catches me out, I’m sprinting to catch up. Two away team players are now clean on goal, defender far behind. Away team forwards (no.9 and no.3) are running through. Number 9 has got the ball, dribbles all the way to the edge of the box when Number 3 smashes it in. I believed when Number 9 took the touch, Number 3 was offside. They say you can tell by a reaction when a decision is wrong. And when I disallowed that goal, I knew that. Away manager furious, and the AR comes storming onto the pitch and shouts “What’s the ****ing point of me having this flag then ref. I called for a handball earlier and you ignored that, and you’ve just given that decision offside when it was clearly on” extremely aggressively. I stop the clock and explain to the away team manager, whilst I was extremely shaken up, he needs to get rid of the parent AR right now. Away team manager seemed reluctant to deal with this psychopath but home team manager threatened to abandon the game if he didn’t. After much pressure, away team manager removed him. I then spoke to the away team manager and explained why I’d made the decision I made. He accepted what he saw, and as annoyed as he was believing he was on, he accepted it. Game played on with 10 minutes to go, home team score winning goal with minutes to go (last thing I wanted.) I blow the full time whistle, and ignoring the away parents shouts of its 2-2 boys. Spoke to someone after the game who I immensely trust, and he told me it was the wrong call by quite a bit. Dammit. Three Shelf parents walked over to acclaim my performance, saying while they disagreed with my mistake my handling of the situation and the rest of my game were brilliant. Away team manager gave me his number after the match, saying he needs a ref (turns out idiot parent AR is their usual ref but has received complaints before.) Not wanting to deal with parents like that, I never texted him back. I reported it all under misconduct to County FA over WGS, got a call from Head of Refereeing to check on me and promise me they were gonna try sanction him. The home club put a separate report in about him as it turns out he was swearing at the home teams kids, and threatening them by saying he knows where they live. I didn’t hear this, and none of the kids reported it until after the match, but the fact he’s refereeing games is scary. Still waiting for a sanction unfortunately
I am sure no one remembers this post, but I have quoted the final paragraph, which details the abuse I received from the AR which I have talked about on this forum since. Whilst nothing has yet to come, after over a year, he’s been found guilty of swearing at the home team kids and threatening them by saying he knows where they live. Apparently he did it to another team, and that’s what’s sparked the guilty charge. Scary this guy was a parent, let alone refereeing matches. Still nothing to come of the reported abuse to me, but I guess if he hasn’t abused a ref since they don’t have much evidence. Don’t know what the sanction is now
 
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