confidence
- Thread starter Ryan
- Start date
What age group do you usually ref? I think you just need to remember that of all the people on the field of play, you're the one who has passed a test on the laws of the game. Your job is to give decisions as you see them, and that's all you can do really. Just enjoy the game as much as you can and don't worry about making mistakes, everyone does!
I'd also really recommend joining your local RA if you haven't already, you can chat to other refs about how they deal/ have dealt with their own confidence issues.
Hope this helps buddy
I'd also really recommend joining your local RA if you haven't already, you can chat to other refs about how they deal/ have dealt with their own confidence issues.
Hope this helps buddy
Big yes to joining your local RA, and finding a mentor. Someone to chat about games, mentality, performance, decision, improvement is a massive aid for any level of referee.
It's something that will come, good clear and positive signals help 'sell' decisions, if you're a quiet lad just start opening the voice up a little at really obvious decisions ("goal kick") and you'll find it will develop from there.
Don't fret about a decision, once you've given it, that's it. Start thinking about the next decision. Cut yourself some slack :] You've passed the exam, you're fit enough to referee, players and officials will generally respect that, don't think otherwise. Afterwards if you can talk things through with a mentor or refereeing friend, then great.
I still get nervous before every game, anxiety and excitement probably, but it's always there.
It can feel like a lonely job, but you've always got us colleagues, friends, us lot here to help you develop.
It's something that will come, good clear and positive signals help 'sell' decisions, if you're a quiet lad just start opening the voice up a little at really obvious decisions ("goal kick") and you'll find it will develop from there.
Don't fret about a decision, once you've given it, that's it. Start thinking about the next decision. Cut yourself some slack :] You've passed the exam, you're fit enough to referee, players and officials will generally respect that, don't think otherwise. Afterwards if you can talk things through with a mentor or refereeing friend, then great.
I still get nervous before every game, anxiety and excitement probably, but it's always there.
It can feel like a lonely job, but you've always got us colleagues, friends, us lot here to help you develop.
MattyontheWhistle
RefChat Addict
I'd echo what has already been said. I will add a piece of advice given to me early on; try and keep your head up during the game, don't slouch. Keep the head up when you need the whistle and bring the whistle UP to your mouth, not mouth DOWN to whistle.
As soon as players hear the whistle they look at you, if you are standing/walking tall, head high with a strong arm signal they will generally respect that. If you look the part you're half way there - even if you're in turmoil inside.
We all get nerves before a game, thrive on them. They can make you sharper and more alert.
Good luck.
As soon as players hear the whistle they look at you, if you are standing/walking tall, head high with a strong arm signal they will generally respect that. If you look the part you're half way there - even if you're in turmoil inside.
We all get nerves before a game, thrive on them. They can make you sharper and more alert.
Good luck.
Mick.
RefChat Addict
Ryan I too echo what has been said above. I would also add, turn up looking reasonably well turned out. I dont mean a suit necessarily but clean jeans and a shirt or clean t shirt - rather than your ripped fashion jeans and ac/DC top. If you look the part from the start (with a firm handshake) both teams will have confidence in you. Also give some thought to joining a debating club if there is one at school. Any public speaking will help with boosting your confidence. Above all though, enjoy yourself.
This will boost your confidence as well.
This will boost your confidence as well.
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SM
The avuncular one
A couple of tricks I find helped me.
On the way to the game be positive about the upcoming game, don't allow worrying or negative thoughts. "This is going to be a great game, I am going to enjoy myself"
Positive affirmations. I have a little mantra that I repeat to myself about being positive, Confident, being pro active in approach and anticipating what I need to see and where I need to be. I always end with "Today I am the ******* offspring of Collina and Webb!" - that bit is just for my own amusement! Cant take yourself to seriously! If I haven't started with this on the car journey (some bouncy music to sing along to is normal!) I will take a couple of minutes after the warm up and stretches back in the changing room prior to coming back out for kick off. A mirror really helps at this point!!
When you arrive at the venue, chat with players or team officials even the odd spectator about football - either in general or about their teams recent games. Not every one will want to chat (you can tell after the "hello, how you doing?") but there are always a few who will happily chew the fat about the beautiful game! We are all footie fans at the end of the day.
Finally, I provide a running monologue during the game "good shot, unlucky, straight out goal kick", "great tackle, won the ball clean, corner" etc. seems to help in 2 ways as the players know I am paying attention and secondly it helps me maintain concentration! I remember an assessor telling me I was too quiet, now I don't shut up!
Personal to me obviously, but they work for me.
On the way to the game be positive about the upcoming game, don't allow worrying or negative thoughts. "This is going to be a great game, I am going to enjoy myself"
Positive affirmations. I have a little mantra that I repeat to myself about being positive, Confident, being pro active in approach and anticipating what I need to see and where I need to be. I always end with "Today I am the ******* offspring of Collina and Webb!" - that bit is just for my own amusement! Cant take yourself to seriously! If I haven't started with this on the car journey (some bouncy music to sing along to is normal!) I will take a couple of minutes after the warm up and stretches back in the changing room prior to coming back out for kick off. A mirror really helps at this point!!
When you arrive at the venue, chat with players or team officials even the odd spectator about football - either in general or about their teams recent games. Not every one will want to chat (you can tell after the "hello, how you doing?") but there are always a few who will happily chew the fat about the beautiful game! We are all footie fans at the end of the day.
Finally, I provide a running monologue during the game "good shot, unlucky, straight out goal kick", "great tackle, won the ball clean, corner" etc. seems to help in 2 ways as the players know I am paying attention and secondly it helps me maintain concentration! I remember an assessor telling me I was too quiet, now I don't shut up!
Personal to me obviously, but they work for me.
Hi Ryan! It's a very good point you bring up so thanks for sharing it. Apart from reiterating everything that's being said I'd just like to add that, in my experience, managers and players tend to be thinking about the game a lot more than the referee and respect your role - you have passed the exam and are deemed good enough to take charge of matches so keep that in mind. Most understand you have a hard job. I had a game where I was shouted at for most of the game from one manager who came up to me after the game and said, 'I know how hard a job you have because I took the course." You won'y make many friends in non-referees but you'll gain respect for going out there and doing your best.Also, while on the pitch it's important to sell decisions. The first red card I gave I was very uneasy inside due to the, let's say, 'abuse' coming from the sidelines as they could see the card in my hand. Although I was shaking on the inside I knew the decision was correct and I sold it.
It's too easy to tell someone who isn't confident to be confident but as you gain more experience, referee more matches and see the same things occurring you'll gain the confidence to make good, strong decisions.
It's too easy to tell someone who isn't confident to be confident but as you gain more experience, referee more matches and see the same things occurring you'll gain the confidence to make good, strong decisions.
Fake it 'til you make it, mate. Even if you don't feel confident, be mindful to look it.
Late to this one, but it might make the OP Ryan feel better than even after more than 400 games, I still get nervous the night before the game and often don't sleep too well.
Loud whistle. Strong body language. Players will accept your decision if you show no doubt about it. Even if you make a good decision, they'll argue with it if you look like you doubt yourself.
Richthekeeper
Active Member
Smile and enjoy it - remember why you took up the whistle in the first place!
I've found so far that not taking yourself too seriously and showing that you're human are traits that work well at my level. If I go higher I'm sure I'll have to be a little more officious but at the moment having a chat and a laugh with the players and reminding them that we're all out in the cold on a Saturday afternoon for the same reason helps!
I've found so far that not taking yourself too seriously and showing that you're human are traits that work well at my level. If I go higher I'm sure I'll have to be a little more officious but at the moment having a chat and a laugh with the players and reminding them that we're all out in the cold on a Saturday afternoon for the same reason helps!
Richthekeeper
Active Member
Oops! Double post.